When you’re on retreat, defilement doesn’t come to disturb you. But when you’re nearing the end, then it’s their turn.
This is nature – that’s why you should never stop meditating. You don’t meditate only in the center; meditation is for life.
If you want to maintain this quality of mind, you should meditate like in the center. You cannot avoid this.
In the center, you’re observing body and mind; at home, you’re also observing body and mind. What’s the difference?
The way you think is different. If you’re also thinking like this in your life, you can meditate at home. But in your daily life, meditation is not important. Other things are more important – business and family are more important. Then, you lose your awareness, and later and later, the habit disappears.
Only 2 or 3 days out of the center, you start to lose awareness. So, meditation nature is such that you should not stop meditating because meditation is a long-term practice.