1301. PRACTICING WITH RESTLESSNESS AND STRESS
Sasanarakkha Buddhist Sanctuary Retreat Zoom Q&A Group A 6 January 2023 (1:15:30-1:23:42)
Yogi: I was more tense and restless in the first 2 days and I tried to relax by not pushing myself too hard. I tend to overthink and that leads to restlessness and tension. The mind is constantly not stable.
Sayadaw advices to practice samatha to calm the mind; do I understand it right?
Sayadaw: First thing, you want to tell yourself that thinking is not a problem. Thinking is the nature of the mind; it is a function of the mind. You want to tell your mind this because it doesn’t make your thinking into a problem.
The second thing is you want to meditate – you still need to be aware of something.
Take an object – but not be aware of thinking – and very gently you want to keep bringing your attention to the object; just know the object, again and again.
When you have managed to do this repeatedly, then you can take a look at your thoughts if you want to. That’s when you are ready.
If your thoughts come with associated feelings – and you can recognize something you’re thinking is accompanied by feelings – stop watching the thoughts and prioritize the feelings and use that as your object as much as possible.
As we keep observing the relationship between this thought and this feeling and if it comes with suffering and we’re not rejecting it, eventually the mind will think negatively less.
1302. WHEN THE RIGHT INFORMATION CAN GUIDE THE PRACTICE
Sasanarakkha Buddhist Sanctuary Retreat Zoom Q&A Group A 10 January 2023 (1:26:00-1:33:02)
Yogi: I’m not good at watching the mind. There is an interval where I’m lost in thought between knowing the thinking and switching to knowing the body sensation. How can I stop the thoughts between knowing thinking and knowing body sensation? And, how can I see the connection between the mind and the body?
Sayadaw: You’re fine right now. You are practicing observing and that is all you need to do right now. There is no need to make a connection between thoughts and body sensations. You’re just trying to ground your attention to the body or else the mind will be thinking too much.
It won’t be connected. Just be aware of your sensations – your breath or hearing – and keep doing that.
When your thoughts are actually causing sensations in the body, for example, when people are worried, they have a bad feeling in the heart or when they’re angry, the whole body feels hot, that’s when they are connected.
When you come to the body, you not only notice the bodily sensations but also notice the feelings in the heart area. That is connected to how the mind feels. That will give you a closeness to the mind. Just be content to do the exercise of being aware of what is happening inside the body and in the feelings.
1303. DEALING WITH LOW CONFIDENCE
Sasanarakkha Buddhist Sanctuary Retreat Zoom Q&A Group A 10 January 2023 (33:52-41:30)
Yogi: How do I overcome low self-confidence? I notice that it impedes my practice too.
Sayadaw: Firstly, you don’t lack self-confidence all the time, right? Use your awareness to recognize and acknowledge the times when you’re feeling normal confidence or good confidence. You want to acknowledge and be happy at those times; that will remind the mind whenever you feel confident.
Secondly, when you don’t have confidence, remember that if you have a lot of expectations and they are not met, you will feel low confidence. High expectation is wrong attitude and also unrealistic.
When something is unrealistic, we’ll have low confidence because we’ll feel like we are never going to achieve it. But why do we need to achieve it?
Watch the high expectation and feeling of low confidence with that background understanding, breathing deeply, and letting it go. If we can reduce it a bit, we’re doing good.
We can never get as much as we hope because what we get will match what we can do. Even if the low confidence reduces a little bit, it is a good sign – we need to celebrate small gains. Do it little by little and don’t have the expectation that it is going to disappear or it’ll set you up for low confidence.
1304. DEVELOPING OUR AWARENESS IS THE CRUX OF THE PRACTICE
Sasanarakkha Buddhist Sanctuary Retreat Zoom Q&A Group A 10 January 2023 (1:45:26-1:47:15)
Yogi: If I hear it right, the key to the practice is developing the continuity of the awareness, that this is foremost in the practice. May I confirm this understanding?
Sayadaw: Right, continue being aware.
Yogi: If I design my practice in such a way that I’m aware of seeing and hearing and I switch between knowing these two objects, is this encouraged?
Sayadaw: Yes, you can.
1305. WATCHING THE UNPLEASANT SENSATION
Sasanarakkha Buddhist Sanctuary Retreat Zoom Q&A Group A 10 January 2023 (1:09:00-1:12:20)
Yogi: I still can’t see pain as nature. When I watch the hot sensation, the mind keeps going to the disliking. How can I learn to see the pain correctly?
Sayadaw: It is normal to not like the sensation that the mind doesn’t like.
When you watch the disliking mind, just check what level the disliking is. As you watch it, take a few deep breaths and see if the disliking decreases a bit.
If it gets less, then you can watch the heat again and you’ll notice the disliking again. And maybe the disliking has increased. Then go back to the disliking and watch it again to and fro with the heat and disliking.
Take that as an exercise.
Yogi: Sometimes I ask myself what is wrong with the disliking and it releases some, but it’ll come back again.
Sayadaw: It’s okay as long as it releases sometimes and you’re okay with that.
1306. CHALLENGES HELP THE MIND LEARN AND GROW
Sasanarakkha Buddhist Sanctuary Retreat Zoom Q&A Group B 8 January 2023 (1:23:25-1:29:32)
Yogi: Usually at the beginning of the retreat, there will be some difficult situations, and some bodily discomfort and it triggers a lot of awareness and immediately after that, there is happiness because the mind recognizes the cultivation of the mind.
Sayadaw: It is healthy for the mind to face challenges because the mind that is too peaceful is not growing and does not mature. The challenges the mind faces, if we’re able to stay mindful, help the mind to learn and grow.
1307. DON’T MEDITATE VERY SERIOUSLY
Sasanarakkha Buddhist Sanctuary Retreat Zoom Q&A Group A 10 January 2023 (1:03:10-1:07:15)
Yogi: I do my meditation on the move because I’m a very active person. When I learned about this meditation, I can’t really sit properly. I just observe whatever I can observe during daily activities.
Initially, it was quite alright, and only recently I notice that the restlessness has become very obvious. I worry about this.
Sayadaw: Don’t meditate very seriously; relax and pretend that you’re on vacation and not meditating. Don’t watch the restlessness. If you watch it too directly and the mind is afraid of it, it’ll make it worse.
Do something that makes you happy while being aware of yourself; it could be washing the dishes or anything active.
1308. WE OBSERVE WHAT THE MIND IS DOING, NOT DIRECT THE DOING
Sasanarakkha Buddhist Sanctuary Retreat Zoom Q&A Group A 6 January 2023 (1:25:22-1:26:21)
Yogi: Sayadaw advices to start being aware of 1 object and then expand it to 2 objects, is that correct?
Sayadaw: You misunderstand the instruction. It is not to expand the awareness – we don’t do anything but to notice something.
Stay on 1 object and if the mind begins to notice more objects, then recognize that the mind is starting to know more objects.
It is not to start to know more objects, but rather if the mind starts to notice more objects, recognize that.
Yogi: If the mind just notices breath, then it notices breath; and if the mind notices breath and seeing, then it notices breath and seeing. Got it. Thank you so much.
1309. KEEPING THE EYES OPEN OR CLOSED OR HALF OPEN
Sasanarakkha Buddhist Sanctuary Retreat Zoom Q&A Group A 10 January 2023 (1:15:12-1:16:16)
Yogi: As a beginner yogi, can I open my eyes while practicing sitting meditation or walking meditation?
Sayadaw: Yes, for both sitting and walking meditation.
Yogi: I will have my eyes half open while walking.
Sayadaw: You can have your eyes fully open. Meditation is the work of the mind; the mind is being aware.
So, whether you open your eyes or close your eyes or half open your eyes, it really doesn’t matter so long as your mind observes.
1310. HOW TO DISCERN SEEING FROM LOOKING
Sasanarakkha Buddhist Sanctuary Retreat Zoom Q&A Group A 10 January 2023 (1:47:32-1:50:55)
Yogi: I try to be aware of seeing and looking, but I’m not sure what is the difference. Also, what is the difference between seeing and looking and the awareness of seeing and looking?
Sayadaw: Close your eyes and don’t open yet. When you open, know whether you can see.
Now, open your eyes. Can you see?
Yogi: Yes.
Sayadaw: Now, do you know that you can see?
Yogi: Yes.
Sayadaw: That’s it. Simple, right?
Now, you’re looking at the camera; what can you see?
Yogi: I can see the hall, I can see the Buddha image, and I can see the laptop.
Sayadaw: Okay. Then you’re looking, right?
Yogi: Oh, okay, okay. Thank you.
1311. LEARN TO FACE DIFFICULT SITUATIONS
Sasanarakkha Buddhist Sanctuary Retreat Zoom Q&A Group B 8 January 2023 (1:29:00-1:32:00)
The mind having challenges is healthy for the mind. The mind that is too peaceful is not growing and does not mature. If we’re able to be up to the challenge of the difficulties the mind faces, and stay mindful, it helps the mind to learn and grow.
When we’re dying, it’s not going to be comfortable. For most of us, dying is not going to be a pleasant experience.
We should take every opportunity to face difficulties in our lives with mindfulness. Appreciate that mindfulness is present because if mindfulness guides us, we’re not going to get lost in the story of what we’re experiencing.
It’s our habit to look for pleasant experiences in meditation – we’re always wanting the next insight, but that's not going to happen when we’re dying.
What we’re going to have will be the problems we need to face. So, try to face them now.
1312. ASKING ADVICE ON UNDERSTANDING OWN PRACTICE
Sasanarakkha Buddhist Sanctuary Retreat Zoom Q&A Group A 10 January 2023 (07:24-16:10)
Yogi: I can watch the emotions when they are strong like aversion, but under normal conditions, I don’t know how to practice because I can only watch by feeling the emotion or the calmness.
Sayadaw: When you have no difficult emotion and the attitude is right, there is nothing more to check, take a primary object or ask yourself what the mind is aware of now? See if it picks up any of the 5 physical senses.
Stay with that and check your attitude now and again.
Yogi: Do I have to fix a specific physical object? When I sit, I don’t know what to do; I’ll try to get an object like the breath but it is very difficult for me to stay with the breath.
Sayadaw: Don’t use the breath then; use something that is easy for you. When you’re calm, what can you be aware of?
Yogi: These few days when I’m tense and cannot practice, I try to relax. Today, I try to do nothing and just let it be. I close my eyes and can begin to feel the body and my breath without doing anything. But the objects keep changing; I cannot just pay attention to one object.
Do I need to fix to one object or let the awareness go here or there?
Sayadaw: Let it go to more objects.
Yogi: I have the idea that the mind should fix onto one object to get the samadhi or calm mind.
Sayadaw: We’re not being aware to calm down – so long as the mind doesn’t have doubt, greed, and aversion, the mind will be calm. If those things are present, yes, the mind won’t be calm. But that is okay because we just have to know that.
Whether the mind is calm or not is not because of one or many objects; the mind is calm when there is no greed, anger, and delusion. When the defilements are present, the mind is not calm.
1313. IDEAS THAT ARE HOLDING US BACK
Sasanarakkha Buddhist Sanctuary Retreat Zoom Q&A Group B 8 January 2023 (1:43:10-1:58:05)
Yogi: During long retreats, my samadhi was good during the sit and I could be aware of all objects, even pain, without reacting to them. This experience keeps on repeating in every sitting. Is there something I’m missing? My daily activity awareness isn’t good and I try to do more walking meditation.
Sayadaw: Don’t sit so long; if you want to have the same quality of awareness when you go about your daily activities, do more daily activity awareness until you get the same quality of awareness as when you sit.
Yogi: I get my samadhi which then builds up the awareness only when I’m sitting.
Sayadaw: We’re not looking at samadhi; we’re looking at awareness. You don’t need more samadhi; it is balanced enough because your mind is not dull but you need to carry the awareness into your daily life. Your lack is practicing in daily life and making it seamless.
So, work on maintaining the awareness when you’re walking and eating.
Yogi: I can only get my daily activity awareness by building up the sitting samadhi and awareness. Without that process, it can be off for days before I remember to be aware in daily life. I need a month or so to build up a stable samadhi from the sitting.
Sayadaw: You have become attached to the idea that that samadhi gives you that type of awareness. You are not even giving yourself a chance; you are hindering any process you have by being disappointed that is not like that instead of celebrating every moment you have awareness, even if it is once a day.
You’re spending your time lamenting over what you cannot get instead of celebrating what you have.
Please go with the momentary samadhi. If you’re waiting for the big samadhi to carry your mindfulness, then when you’re about to die, you’ll have to go for retreat for a month first.
Forget about getting that kind of samadhi; work on being thankful for every moment your mind remembers to be aware and balance your sitting and walking with daily activities and work on appreciating every moment of mindfulness.
Yogi: There is another challenge. At the retreat, the mind can do the yogi’s jobs easily, but once I’m at home, the mind refuses to practice.
Sayadaw: We come geared up in a certain way when we go for retreat, but we don’t gear ourselves up the same way to practice at home. We don’t come with determination.
Home life isn’t going to take away our care for the Dhamma. The Dhamma doesn’t say we have to sit and wake up early. Everything is Dhamma; so, why do we categorize the Dhamma by when I wake up early and I do this or I sit, then it is practice. So, we have all these fixed ideas and undermine ourselves.
It is our mind that matters the most. What are our beliefs that are holding us back? What is in our mind that is telling us we cannot practice at home?
A big part of practicing at home is contentment and appreciation. If we go home and expect to practice as we practice on retreat, we’re always going to be disappointed. But if we’re happy for every second that we’re mindful and appreciate it, we’re going to grow it.
1314. DO NOT ASSUME LEARNING ONLY HAPPENS WHEN YOU ASK QUESTIONS
Sasanarakkha Buddhist Sanctuary Retreat Zoom Q&A Group B 8 January 2023 (33:57-38:17)
Yogi: On the cushion, it seems that the knower is more obvious than the object. It is able to notice many objects but they’re not clear; the knowing is clearer.
Whenever I ask questions, it interrupts the awareness process. How can I ask questions for the purpose of learning then?
Sayadaw: You need to understand what learning means. Firstly, when you’re interested in the experience and you’re recognizing the quality of what is happening in your field of experience, learning is already happening.
You recognize that it feels more like the knower and not so much the knowing mind; you recognize that the knower can know many objects. This indicates that learning is already happening.
You need to understand that learning is happening when it is happening and not that learning happens only when you ask a question.
1315. WE DEEPEN OUR UNDERSTANDING OF AN OBJECT WITH EXPERIENCE
Sasanarakkha Buddhist Sanctuary Retreat Zoom Q&A Group B 8 January 2023 (1:15:40-1:21:16)
Yogi: I broke parts of my vertebrae in an accident and was hospitalized for 3 months. During that time, I was totally mindful and happy to be alive.
When I had recovered, I tried to meditate, but because of the trauma, it was chaotic whenever I tried to watch the mind. How do I deal with the chaotic mind?
Sayadaw: The chaotic mind is just the mind; it is no different from any other mind.
We just do our yogi’s jobs and try watch it without blaming ourselves. Be happy that there is awareness; then, that’s fine.
One thing to remember – you were very mindful before that and were very happy that you were alive. We like it when we’re happy and we’re not so mindful of the happiness itself although we could be mindful of other things.
We let ourselves be happy heedlessly although we are mindful of other things. We then suffer more when chaos come because of the contrast. We suffer more because we weren’t in a state of awareness of happiness, investigating happiness and understanding its nature. When we lose it, we suffer more.
But as far as being aware, chaotic mind is the same. Everything is still an object – happy mind is an object and a chaotic mind is also an object.
1316. WORLDLY INSIGHTS AND SPIRITUAL INSIGHTS
Sasanarakkha Buddhist Sanctuary Retreat Zoom Q&A Group A 6 January 2023 (1:02:00-1:05:12)
Yogi: I feel that some of my insights are worldly insights like there is a problem and some thoughts come to relieve the suffering. I look at it more like solving worldly problems. It is not the kind of wisdom that understands reality, the more spiritual type of insight.
Sayadaw: If you understand that something is cause and effect, if you understand that the mind works this way, if you understand that the body works this way, if you understand that the mind and body work this way and therefore are interacting this way together, therefore there are these causes and effects, therefore this is the way things are, that’s a spiritual insight, a lokuttara nana because it is about mind-matter cause and effect.
Those insights can come in very ordinary ways, for example, in seeing, there is a nature that can see, and there is not a person that sees. You can either understand this in a very isolated spiritual insight way or you can understand that this is how it is. If you see some affliction and can see that this nature is at work, and you’re not caught up in the grief of it, that is also an insight into that nature.
Because we glorify these ‘wow’ moments, we undermine all the ways that our ordinary insights are important.
1317. THE BROAD DEFINITION OF AN INSIGHT
Sasanarakkha Buddhist Sanctuary Retreat Zoom Q&A Group A 6 January 2023 (1:00:35-1:01:58)
If you’re aware and your mind is fairly free of greed, anger and delusion, when the mind faces a difficult situation and the mind recognizes what needs to be done, that’s an insight, that’s wisdom.
When the mind has less greed, anger and delusion and it knows what to do in a given situation, that’s wisdom at work. That’s the general definition of insight at work.
1318. WHAT TO DO WHEN WE KEEP FALLING ASLEEP DURING THE SIT
Sasanarakkha Buddhist Sanctuary Retreat Zoom Q&A Group A 10 January 2023 (1:33:23-1:38:00)
Yogi: I keep falling asleep when I sit meditate, in almost every sitting. I don’t eat heavy meals; probably I don’t know how to watch.
Sayadaw: It’s going to keep happening because you’ve developed the habit of falling asleep during the sit.
Firstly, you must keep the mind awake. You can ask questions – e.g. Am I still aware?
You can also sit up straighter, put something on your head so that you wake up when it falls off, and keep your eyes open.
Talk to yourself; actively use your thinking to keep you awake. You can name what you’re aware of: I’m aware of this now and I’m aware of that now.
If after 10 minutes you still keep on falling asleep, get up and walk. Just don’t keep allowing the mind to sleep when you sit.
Secondly, it helps if you make your mindfulness in daily activities more continuous. Again, if you lose your mindfulness often in daily life, name your awareness – I’m aware of walking now, I’m aware of heat now, I’m aware of touching sensation now.
1319. PERSISTENT AWARENESS MEANS BEING CONSISTENT
Sasanarakkha Buddhist Sanctuary Retreat Zoom Q&A Groups A+B 14 January 2023 (1:36:52-1:40:07)
Yogi: How do I cultivate the persistent light awareness? I find that I put too much energy into being aware because I feel tired.
Sayadaw: We tend to think of persistence as something very continuous; so, when we make that kind of effort, it becomes very tight.
It is rather doing something consistently – there may be gaps, but if you’re consistent, it is okay. Do it at a pace that doesn’t make you tense.
We don’t have to aim for any kind of continuity.
1320. THE CRAZY MIND THAT CRAVES SUFFERING
Sasanarakkha Buddhist Sanctuary Retreat Zoom Q&A Group B 12 January 2023 (57:40-1:00:22)
Yogi: I see that at times my mind is craving suffering. Is this nature or is my mind crazy?
Sayadaw: This is so normal; it is crazy but you’re not alone. The Buddha called us puthujjana or mad worldlings.
The mind has habit patterns and there is craving for suffering. Look at the number of people who go to watch sad or tragic movies. We want to go and experience all this suffering.
The good news is that when we know it is crazy to crave suffering, that is already one step out of it.
1321. WE DON’T HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT LATENT GREED
Sasanarakkha Buddhist Sanctuary Retreat Zoom Q&A Group B 12 January 2023 (1:15:30-1:17:25)
Yogi: It seems almost impossible to see the potential greed in the background of our experiences.
Sayadaw: We don’t have to worry about the greed when it is just a potential in the mind; it is untouchable. It’s only when the object triggers greed and the greed actually arisen that we can observe it.
1322. A WINDOW INTO THE LOWER OR HIGHER REALM OF EXISTENCE
Sasanarakkha Buddhist Sanctuary Retreat Zoom Q&A Group B 16 January 2023 (11.00-14:13)
Yogi: If I don’t meditate this lifetime, does it mean I’ll be reborn in a lower realm in the next life?
Sayadaw: The formula for whether we go to the lower or upper realm is: the more unskillful qualities there are in the mind, the tendency is for the mind to go into the lower realms.
Our mind is a habit pattern. If you allow unskillful habit patterns to dominate the mind, then when we’re dying, the more likely the mind will be unskillful.
The formula for going to the upper realm is to cultivate the mind to be more skillful. When you die with a wholesome state of mind, it will lead the mind to the upper realms.
Practicing meditation, cultivating the wholesome qualities of the mind, you’re practicing the Dhamma, then it is more likely to lead you to a higher realm.
We don’t have to look to the next life because in this life, our level of being, how happy we’re in general, and how confident we feel, already tell us whether we’re cultivating more skillful states of mind or more unskillful states of mind.
When we’re unhappy, more unskillful states are actually taking place in our mind and when we’re generally feeling happy, more skillful states are taking place in our mind.
We don’t have to wait until we die to find out if we’re in a lower or higher realm. We go through it every day as well.
1323. SAMSARA AND THE NEXT LIFE
Sasanarakkha Buddhist Sanctuary Retreat Zoom Q&A Group B 16 January 2023 (09.55-11:00)
Yogi: Is samsara real or not?
Sayadaw: Every day is samsara; you don’t have to wait until you die.
Every day, we have to wake up and brush our teeth; and we have to do the same this and that. We probably repeat a few hundred things every day and that is samsara.
(15:50-16:24) Sayadaw: Which do you think is further away, tomorrow or the next life?
Yogi: The next life.
Sayadaw: You can think that way and you must also know that your next mind is your next life. Every moment that our mind arises is another life; so, it is the next life every moment.
1324. THE FEELING AGGREGATE – VEDANA KHANDA
Sasanarakkha Buddhist Sanctuary Retreat Zoom Q&A Groups A+B 14 January 2023 (1:02:25-1:05:20)
Yogi: How do I begin to observe feeling?
Sayadaw: You know your mind is made up of the 5 Aggregates and one of the aggregates is vedana or feeling; it’s the aggregate that does the job of feeling. But feeling is just a function and not a judgment yet.
Then you have sanna which is perception; its job is to interpret or give meaning.
So, when there is contact with something, the mind first senses it, and then the mind gives meaning to it, but it happens very quickly and you may not be able to recognize feeling and interpretation separately.
If you understand that these are two different natures that are working together in the mind, it is good enough. Feeling and perception are working together to give you the interpretation that something is a pleasant or unpleasant object.
Yogi: So, when I notice that something is pleasant or unpleasant, it is already observing the feeling?
Sayadaw: Both vedana and sanna are already there, but whether you can recognize the feeling part alone is not important. If you understand that intellectually, it is okay already.
1325. HANDLING GRIEF
Sasanarakkha Buddhist Sanctuary Retreat Zoom Q&A Groups A+B 14 January 2023 (22:37-31:27)
Yogi: I have lost my father and still grieve over it – how do I deal with my emotions when they arise?
Sayadaw: The more you understand what your grief is about by being willing to be aware, the less the emotions will arise. The most important thing is to watch it objectively, and if it is getting overwhelming, stop watching and only face it another time when the mind is more settled.
Be patient because it’ll take time to discover more about grief.
Yogi: When I watch the grief, it’s so strong like it is eating me.
Sayadaw: Do not look at the thoughts but watch the associated feelings.
In our thoughts there are the story, our identification, emotions, and attachment – all are bundled together by our thoughts and we’ll get completely sucked in. We want to be distant from the thoughts – we don’t need to figure out the thoughts and think our way through them.
We just have to do the exercise of being aware and appreciating that we’re aware and making the effort. As we do the work, slowly things will unravel by themselves.
Our work is not to look at the thoughts, but rather being aware of the feelings, be positive and appreciating the exercise of mindfulness.
There is a reason to observe and watch. When we observe, what we’re growing are the positive qualities of the mind and the 5 spiritual faculties. When that happens, the negative minds reduce and understanding can arise. We don’t have to fight with the negative minds or wish that they decrease, we just have to observe.
So long as we have the intention to understand our grief, and as we do the exercises, the mind will unravel for you.
1326. MEDITATING TO REDUCE ANXIETY
Sasanarakkha Buddhist Sanctuary Retreat Zoom Q&A Groups A+B 14 January 2023 (17:17-22:20)
Yogi: I faint when I’m anxious because I suffer from epilepsy. I’m using meditation to reduce my anxiety. How may I solve this problem more effectively?
Sayadaw: When you’re content with however you’re practicing, it brings ease of mind. You don’t want your practice to be another cause of anxiety or striving.
The key is to appreciate that you’re practicing so that it helps the mind to want to keep practicing.
If I appreciate that doing A is enough, then A will lead to B, and B is enough. If the practice falls back to A, A is still enough.
It is always enough and that brings ease in practicing because the mind is not thinking it should be something else.
You want to become okay with the anxiety so that you’re not trying to get rid of the anxiety. Once the mind thinks that becoming okay means that you won’t have anxiety, then you’ll be afraid that anxiety will come. Instead, think that you can be okay even if it arises because you can be aware of it.
Remember that this is an exercise that you’re doing; even if there is fear of the anxiety coming, recognize that also.
Be happy that you recognize something; that’s important.
1327. ATTITUDE IS ALSO CONDITIONED
Sasanarakkha Buddhist Sanctuary Retreat Zoom Q&A Group B 12 January 2023 (1:06:25-1:12:16)
Yogi: I’ve been noticing a basic craving for comfort that appears all the time.
I had to adjust to the tropical heat for the first 3-4 days, but it was okay because there was much mindfulness and joy in the practice. Although I sweated a lot, there was no aversion while normally I would react with aversion.
When I climbed up to the meditation hall, I saw a fan and my attitude completely changed. All the equanimity was gone – I realized that the right attitude was so conditioned, and not to be taken for granted.
Sayadaw: You’re right that attitude is also conditioned and deep in our minds everybody has a desire for comfort.
It’s conditioned – when the mind can’t find comfort, then the mind says ‘It’s okay, I’m fine’ until it can find comfort. That’s when the attitude changes and it says ‘I can do without the right attitude because I have found comfort’.
So, don’t look down on the defilements, they’re tricky and greed is the trickiest of them all.
1328. A MIXED BAG OF MINDS HAPPENING AT ANY ONE TIME
Sasanarakkha Buddhist Sanctuary Retreat Zoom Q&A Group B 16 January 2023 (26:33-34:48)
Yogi: Sometimes when I’m aware of aversion, I don’t feel contented. That awareness has wrong attitude in it; it is a mixture of being able to recognize it and yet being unhappy about it.
It’s like a multiple-moment kind of experience.
Sayadaw: Imagine our mind to be like a river and there are many droplets of water in it; any moment there could be a mixture of good and bad happenings and that’s what is happening in our mind. That’s why it feels like that.
1329. A POSITIVE ATTITUDE HELPS TO BRING IN MORE MINDFULNESS
Sasanarakkha Buddhist Sanctuary Retreat Zoom Q&A Group B 16 January 2023 (06:05-09:52)
Yogi: How do I make the practice more consistent? One day I feel successful in meditation and the next day I forget or cannot find the momentum. If I try too hard, the mind will resist and when there’s not enough effort, I can’t find the momentum.
Sayadaw: The mind has to like and value awareness. For that to happen, you actually have to be happy every time the awareness arises, and not think that it’s not good enough.
When you’re happy whenever you notice the awareness even if it’s a little bit, it makes the mind feel successful and encourages the mind to want to do it again.
When you understand this, you’ll always want to congratulate yourself even if you’re a little mindful. Your mind will always feel successful and happy doing it and the awareness will come more and more often because the mind is encouraged whenever the awareness appears.
Whereas if you’re mindful and you think that it’s not enough, it discourages the mind from being mindful because you think it’s not good enough.
You want to be happy that you’re a little mindful so that your mind will want to be mindful more often.
1330. WHEN TO WATCH AN OBJECT AND WHEN TO SWITCH
Sasanarakkha Buddhist Sanctuary Retreat Zoom Q&A Group B 12 January 2023 (1:01:45-1:03:24)
Yogi: Sayadaw once recommended I don’t watch the painful object directly but to watch it together with a neutral object like sound. In this way, it makes the suffering softer.
Sayadaw: At that time, when you had panic attack and the mind was overwhelmed, I said not to look at it, and if you were interested, to use an anchor so that you’d not be sucked into it.
But when the mind is in a good state and it can see the nature of the object, that it is doing this and it is doing that and it is not sucked into the suffering and not involved with it, then you can observe it.
1331. NOT DOING ANYTHING BUT SEEING IT AS IT IS
Sasanarakkha Buddhist Sanctuary Retreat Zoom Q&A Group B 12 January 2023 (39:56-43:52)
Yogi: There are times when the mind is interested but it doesn’t know how to find out more.
It is joyful and vibrant, but it doesn’t know how to start the observation.
Sayadaw: When the 5 Spiritual Faculties are not balanced, that’s when we feel like something is off. Having interest but not knowing what to do is when the faculties are not balanced.
Not knowing what to do is doubt; that is moha. Wisdom comes in one form and moha comes in another.
There’s nothing to do about it except to recognize this is what is happening; recognize there is doubt and the mind doesn’t know what to do, this is what it feels like and continue to be aware of that.
1332. THE PRACTICE GETS COMPLICATED WHEN WE ATTEND TO THE EXPERIENCE
Sasanarakkha Buddhist Sanctuary Retreat Zoom Q&A Group B 16 January 2023 (41:10-44:03)
Yogi: When I’m doing walking meditation, the mind is aware of the walking and the good feeling that the mind is light and wholesome, but then the mind also thinks it is not doing a proper job because it is not watching properly.
The mind is pleased with the light and pleasant feelings and cannot be aware of any other thing. Should I look for other objects or is that enough?
Sayadaw: This is enough. You just keep going with that. Your main job is to be content.
Yogi: The mind thinks that this is attachment and should look for another object.
Sayadaw: Remember that the objects are not important. Knowing that you’re knowing is enough and you can be content.
1333. HOW TO TELL IF WE’RE SUCCESSFUL IN MEDITATION?
Sasanarakkha Buddhist Sanctuary Retreat Zoom Q&A Group B 16 January 2023 (01:00-05:50)
Yogi: Once I watched anger and it disappeared, is this considered successful meditation and is it the right way of meditating?
Sayadaw: Anger can disappear because of any of these reasons.
One is that in trying to be aware, it doesn’t allow your mind to think of the things that make you angry; that makes the anger become less.
Trying to be aware is wholesome work; it can change the quality of the mind and make the anger go away.
You could have actually thought of something in a different way or realized something that makes the anger stop or become less.
But in any case, when you try to be aware of your anger, you have already succeeded in being mindful. You are already successful as far as being mindful is concerned. The result is not important; it is the work that is important.
You want to congratulate yourself for making the effort and recognizing that effort is present and more importantly, the awareness is present.
1334. WATCH THE DEFILEMENT AND NOT TRY TO IMPROVE
Sasanarakkha Buddhist Sanctuary Retreat Zoom Q&A Groups A+B 14 January 2023 (1:44:43-1:44:53)
If there is doubt, you’ll notice that your mind will start to feel like you’re not good enough. Then, you need to watch the doubt, not believe it and think that you need to improve.
You need to watch the doubt and not try to improve.
1335. CHECKING HOW THE MIND IS BEING AWARE
Sasanarakkha Buddhist Sanctuary Retreat Zoom Q&A Group A+B 14 January 2023 (1:36:50-1:40:55)
Yogi: How do I cultivate the light but persistent awareness?
Sayadaw: Be aware with an eye on your mind, the state of your mind – whether your mind is at ease, comfortable and contented, whether it is moving forward in that way. You will then notice if the state of the mind is getting more stable and bright. That is good enough; it shows the work is getting done. And, even if the mind is not stable and bright, the work is also getting done when awareness is present. Recognize your own effort.
1336. ACTIVATE THE MIND TO OVERCOME SLEEPINESS
Sasanarakkha Buddhist Sanctuary Retreat Zoom Q&A Group B 12 January 2023 (1:32:38-1:38:24)
Yogi: When the retreat started, the mind was really sleepy and went into chattering. There was aversion to it; it became very uncomfortable and the mind really wanted to go to sleep.
I couldn’t do much except to stand up and walk.
Sayadaw: When you saw the sleepy mind and it started chattering, right effort and wisdom had become weak and were not working actively anymore.
You should crank it up at the very beginning when you noticed it to inject more right effort or wisdom with right effort and try to activate the mind.
You’ll find yourself getting sleepier and sleepier if you fail to do this and you’ll get sucked into it. Yes, the right thing then is to get up and walk.
To activate right effort is to make the mind active somehow – you can try to increase the frequency of the awareness, body scanning for example and try to watch one spot at a time – head, ear, nose, mouth, sensations down the body all the way to the toes and working up. You can ask questions actively and continuously, like asking what you’re aware of.
You need to be creative to find ways to activate the mind and not just use the things I tell you. When you can’t change your mind, you change your body posture.
1337. AWARENESS BRINGS IN A WHOLESOME MIND
Sasanarakkha Buddhist Sanctuary Retreat Zoom Q&A Group A+B 16 January 2023 (23:00-24:45)
Yogi: If every wholesome state has sati, does it mean that whenever we introduce awareness, it is a wholesome state?
Sayadaw: Yes, but you have to be clear. Every wholesome mind must arise with sati – and when you’re being aware like when we’re trying to meditate, although you might be aware of an unwholesome mind, the awareness itself is wholesome because awareness arises with panna and sati.
1338. BALANCING LAY LIFE WITH MEDITATION
Sasanarakkha Buddhist Sanctuary Retreat Zoom Q&A Group A+B 14 January 2023 (31:50-37:44)
Yogi: It is not easy to meditate in daily life for the beginner. How can I balance a life of sensual pleasures and working life with meditation? If I go too hard there is aversion and no result; if I’m too lazy, I totally don’t meditate.
How can I enjoy sensual pleasure and yet have meditation?
Sayadaw: I don’t say that you cannot have sensual pleasure or do your work. Meditation doesn’t tell you not to do that; also, don’t try too hard to meditate.
The key is just to recognize when you’re aware and always appreciate yourself for having done that even if it comes in bits while you’re working – pat yourself on the back whenever bits of awareness are known.
The more you’re encouraged whenever the awareness comes up, the more the awareness will manifest. The key is to be happy that you have done a little bit.
It’s not that meditation is a separate activity and sensual pleasures and work are a different activity. Meditation is just being aware; so, you can be aware of your work or your sensual pleasures. When you’re happy with the awareness whenever it comes up, it will grow.
When you try to practice in daily life, you’re not trying to overcome all the defilements because you also cannot. Your goal is to be aware only – it’s like if you’re aware, you’re happy. Even if your awareness is scattered moments in the day, the mind will collect the information and put them together for us to understand the defilements more.
1339. HOW DO I CULTIVATE THE APPRECIATION MIND?
Sasanarakkha Buddhist Sanctuary Retreat Zoom Q&A Groups A+B 14 January 2023 (1:33:15-1:36:30)
Yogi: Sayadaw keeps on saying to appreciate the awareness, but my mind simply cannot because it always thinks that it’s not enough.
Sayadaw: First, we have to recognize that we have expectations. We must get so much awareness, then only we think it is enough rather than recognizing that what is happening now is enough.
You have to consciously and deliberately reinforce every time that what is happening now is enough so as to change that habit of the mind.
If we don’t see that expectation, it will continue to be there and nothing will ever be enough.
We always put in as much effort as possible and be content and happy with the results we have now; that is the skill in meditation.
1340. CHECK THE THINKING BEHIND THE FEELING
Sasanarakkha Buddhist Sanctuary Retreat Zoom Q&A Groups A+B 16 January 2023 (45:58-46:52)
Yogi: For me, it is not a matter of seeing the discontented mind; it is a matter of feeling it.
The whole vipassana is all a matter of feeling for me. I immediate feel right or wrong in my chest area and I just feel it automatically.
It is not seeing something; it is feeling something for me, good or bad.
Sayadaw: Sometimes feeling bad about something doesn’t mean it is necessarily bad; it is feeling bad because it is thinking it is bad although it might not be bad at all.
Yogi: This, I have to check.
1341. HOW DO WE UNDERSTAND THE 5 SPIRITUAL FACULTIES AS PARAMIS?
Sasanarakkha Buddhist Sanctuary Retreat Zoom Q&A Groups A+B 14 January 2023 (1:45:20-1:46:21)
Yogi: How are the paramis (qualities to be perfected) related to the 5 Spiritual Faculties?
Sayadaw: A simple definition of parami is whatever good we did yesterday has become the parami for today – you can say that a parami is the result or momentum of a wholesome mind.
There are the 10 paramis and if we’re cultivating these wholesome qualities we’re growing them.
1342. THINK AND DECIDE WITH WISDOM, NOT WHEN CONFUSED AND EMOTIONAL
Sasanarakkha Buddhist Sanctuary Retreat Zoom Q&A Group B 12 January 2023 (2:35:28-2:41:00)
Yogi: When I was in the forest, I had an overwhelming emotion of sadness. It felt like the forest was where I belonged and not in the world where everything was suffering and wrong.
The mind asked: If this is what feels right, why am I still in the world? Even though this feels right, it is not about avoiding the world.
How did Sayadaw know when it was time to leave home?
Sayadaw: I did not become a monk because I was suffering in daily life. I was doing really well meditating in lay life with the support of wisdom and the dhamma.
I became a monk because I found the practice so fascinating that I wanted to dedicate my mind to it more. I was not trying to do better because I was not doing enough.
Yogi: I heard a monk talk about non-self and I cried because there was an understanding not to play-play anymore. Is this thought avoiding lay life?
Sayadaw: Not every decision to renounce daily life is escapism. I wasn’t escaping from something; it was a choice that was meaningful to me. I was not suffering and didn’t have to escape from anything.
1343. ONE DOESN’T GO OFF THE EDGE DUE TO CERTAIN MEDITATION TECHNIQUES
Sasanarakkha Buddhist Sanctuary Retreat Zoom Q&A Group A+B 14 January 2023 (0:35-9:45)
Yogi: I understand that there are many types of meditation and I hear that some of them can make the yogi go mad. I fear that it may happen to me.
Sayadaw: It is not because of the method. What causes people to lose themselves when they try certain kinds of meditation is when they have a lot of defilements in the mind, for example, when we have a lot of greed for results during meditation.
When the greed is very extreme, so extreme that we’re willing to believe or do all sorts of things, and that can lead the mind over the edge.
It’s never the method but the attitude, like how the mind is meditating that is important.
I emphasize how we are meditating; recognizing how much greed or aversion there is while we’re meditating. It is something we can observe and work with rather than be pushed by that greed or aversion to do our meditation.
I ask yogis to check their mind all the time so that they can notice when the mind becomes greedy or have too much expectation or too much aversion and dissatisfaction with what is happening right now. If we recognize the defilements, it helps us to step back and appreciate that awareness is present – and that is good enough.
1344. FEELING IS DIFFERENT FROM LOBHA, DOSA AND MOHA
Sasanarakkha Buddhist Sanctuary Retreat Zoom Q&A Group A & B 14 January 2023 (2:07:35-2:07:57)
Yogi: I think the gap in my understanding is that I thought feeling has liking and disliking, but now I recognize that feeling is just a function; its function is to feel.
Sayadaw: Yes, to feel and not feel something.
Yogi: Not the judgment, result or evaluation.
Sayadaw: Yes.
1345. ARE MERITS TO BE BELIEVED?
Sasanarakkha Buddhist Sanctuary Retreat Zoom Q&A Group A+B 14 January 2023 (39:30-45:20)
Yogi: I’m doubtful about making merits; for me, it’s more a belief. Is merit-making true, the belief that if we do good, our next life will be better and if we do bad, we’ll go to hell in the next life?
Sayadaw: You might call merit the result of wholesome actions; they could be mental, verbal, or bodily actions. This phenomenon is not made up by man. What you doubt is the idea that if you do something now, you’ll get the result only in the next life. It is like: How do you know?
The result of actions is in the present moment. If you do something now, the result will come now. For example, if you’re angry, your mind will be agitated. That is immediate; the result of unwholesome mental action. If you send metta to someone or you think of someone in a loving way, immediately your mind will feel loving and peaceful. That is an immediate result of wholesome mental action.
These are real cause and effect – we can call all the results of wholesome actions merits.
1346. DEVELOP THE SKILL OF WATCHING PHYSICAL AND MENTAL OBJECTS
Sasanarakkha Buddhist Sanctuary Retreat Zoom Q&A Group A+B 14 January 2023 (1:49:24-1:51:24)
Yogi: When I try to be aware of seeing and hearing, very soon the mind goes to observing the mind itself – how it relates to thoughts and happenings. Do I follow this habit?
The mind doesn’t get lost in thought; the mind is clear.
Sayadaw: You can try knowing seeing and the mind and also hearing and the mind.
1347. TRUSTING THAT THE MIND KNOWS HOW TO PRACTICE
Sasanarakkha Buddhist Sanctuary Retreat Zoom Q&A Group A+B 16 January 2023 (38:15-39:17)
Yogi: Sayadaw, how do you consider your mindfulness in daily practice?
Sayadaw: I’m merely checking occasionally. I’m not concerned that sometimes I’m mindful and sometimes I’m not. I trust that the mindfulness knows how to do its work.
I regularly check in, not so much to see if it’s there or not, but if it’s good or not so good mindfulness, whether it is on the ball or not so on the ball.
1348. MEDITATION WORKS IF WE FOLLOW THE INSTRUCTIONS DILIGENTLY
Sasanarakkha Buddhist Sanctuary Retreat Zoom Q&A Group A+B 16 January 2023 (1:06:00-1:09:43)
Yogi: I asked Sayadaw to teach me how I could practice consistently. Sayadaw told me whenever I see, touch, hear or drive to know that seeing, touching, hearing and driving are happening, and to keep on knowing.
At first, it was difficult and my mind was tense; later when I just relaxed and ‘touch-and-go’ whatever was happening, the mind changed and I understood more about the activities of the mind. The more I followed what Sayadaw taught, the more understanding arose.
Sayadaw: The good thing is that you wanted to follow the instructions diligently. You just try to follow instructions; that’s all.
You weren’t thinking about not getting the result or questioning if you were doing it right or wrong.
You try your best to follow instructions and that’s why it works.
The difference between you and the yogis who say that they can't practice at home is that you’re obedient and diligent in following instructions.
1349. RIGHT ATTITUDE MAKES ALL THE DIFFERENCE
Sasanarakkha Buddhist Sanctuary Retreat Zoom Q&A Group A+B 16 January 2023 (1:19:32-1:23:40)
Yogi: I used to watch only my breath; then, Sayadaw said that I could try to be aware of the all the 6 sense doors. I went back and practiced that and found that automatically there was right attitude when I opened up the awareness. Is this correct?
Sayadaw: We don’t need to open our 6 senses – they are always open. These senses are already available; we don’t have to avoid them. We can welcome and know all the 6 senses. We don’t think that we must only watch one thing.
Even if you’re aware of your 6 senses, you don’t know if you have right attitude; you need to check if there is right attitude or not.
You happened to have right attitude, but sometimes you could have wrong attitude. You cannot say that because you can be aware of more senses, there is right attitude.
There are people who are aware of many things but still have wrong attitude. They still think that there’s something wrong and they feel unhappy about it.
You can say the other way: because you have right attitude, that is why you have this experience. It is not the other way around that because you have progressed to this point that you have right attitude.
1350. WE HAVE DIFFERENT WAYS TO DESCRIBE OUR MEDITATION, NO NEED TO COMPARE
Sasanarakkha Buddhist Sanctuary Retreat Zoom Q&A Group A+B 14 January 2023 (1:26:45-1:28:10)
A yogi before you reported discontent with her practice and I can see why. When somebody expresses their practice as much as you did, other yogis will think that that’s meditation and when they don’t have those words to describe their meditation in detail it means that they’re not meditating. That’s not true.
We all have different words to describe our meditation, and it doesn’t mean that we’re not meditating or we’re not aware.
What we have to do is to recognize our own awareness; it is the awareness that matters. I know this and this is what I know. That’s good enough. We don’t have to use the big words for it to be meditation; just the way we know it is good enough. It is good for yogis to know this.
The group interviews lose out this way because we compare ourselves to someone else, and we never should.