Fear of death

| Shwe Oo Min Dhammasukha Tawya: Vassa 2014 Interviews File: R05_0010 (1:05:30-1:06:17)

When you see object and mind, what is you? You think object and mind is you. When you see object and mind passing away, you’re dying already. Every time you see passing away is dying.

Dying is nature; but we think this object and mind is ‘me’. Now, we see object and mind disappearing again and again; we’re dying all the time. Small, small dying and big dying.

When you can understand the small dying, you can accept the big dying. If we can understand the small dying very well, big dying is no problem. This is a natural process.

You cannot experience your body directly

| Kalaw 2016 Retreat – 2016-03/31 Day 4 Dhamma Group Discussion Group D (07:19-10:35)

You need to know what is concept and what is nature/reality. When you watch your hand, you cannot be aware of your hand; you can only think about it. Hand has shape, form and colour; the mind can only think about these, they are concepts. You can directly experience hardness and softness, movement, warmth and cold; these are nature. Concept means the mind starts to think about distance, direction – up and down, left and right, form, shape, colour, name and time; we call these concepts.

If your mind pays attention only to the concept, it is easier for reaction – liking and disliking – to arise. Liking and disliking, anger, craving and delusion mind always pay attention to concepts. Because of habit, ordinary mind always pays attention to concepts; for example, when we try to be aware of seeing, immediately we think about seeing things – man, woman, tree, cars – these are all concepts. Seeing is nature; can see something is nature. After seeing, we think, we give meaning to what we see; it is perception, what we call concept. After this concept, we pay more attention to the concept.

The concept is not real; reality or nature is direct experience. So we cannot know our leg; we can know the pain, or hardness and softness, the touching sensation. That’s the difference between concept and nature.

For example, thinking – the story line is concept; we’re thinking of whom, where or when. But the thinking mind that is happening or working is nature. Now, we’re trying to understand this physical and mental process. We try to be aware of the mind state, not the storyline. If you pay attention to the storyline, immediately happiness, sadness or anger arises. For example, someone we dislike comes, immediately we get angry.

Wisdom is on the awareness side, not experience side

| Shwe Oo Min Dhammasukha Tawya: Vassa 2014 Interviews File: R05_0009 1:35:16-1:36:12)

Wisdom can know what it is; can see what it is. Wisdom is on the awareness side; not experience side. Only wisdom can understand what is right and what is wrong; what is wholesome and what is unwholesome.

Awareness just recognises what is happening. Awareness only knows the experience. When awareness is obvious, it is just obvious; you cannot say that it is wisdom.

[Elsewhere] The object can be suffering but the watching mind is equanimous. This is vipassana.

When watching defilements brings suffering

| Shwe Oo Min Dhammasukha Tawya: Vassa 2014 Interviews File: R05_0009 (1:03:02-1:04:45)

Yogi: Continuing to watch aversion and craving brings a lot of suffering

Sayadaw: Important thing about vipassana is that you have right view and watch – the object can be suffering but the watching mind is equanimous. This is vipassana.

Face the experience; longer and longer, you become more skillful. People don’t want to face their suffering experience, that’s why the practice cannot mature.

Only if you cannot face the experience, then you can use a neutral object like anapana. If you can face, better to face the experience.

Vipassana is facing the experience and learning something from it. Face the situation; stay with it, not running away, and learn something – like a toll gate, you get money from any car passing through. Mind state is like this – let whatever happen and you get the benefit.

Advice for monastics and elders

| Shwe Oo Min Dhammasukha Tawya: Vassa 2014 Interviews File: R05_0009 (17:24-18:26)

Whatever they want, people give. Slowly, they don’t notice about this mind, they become more attached; so, monks and nuns need to know more about the mind.

In our Buddhist world, people respect monks a lot. Every time you get respect, unconsciously the mind likes it – and slowly, the mind becomes proud.

If you don’t get respect next time, you become angry. You have to be careful because people respect and give you first. If you don’t notice your mind, every time unconsciously the mind enjoys, likes it and becomes happy. And slowly, the habit becomes very strong, and later whenever you cannot get first, you become angry.

Ice cream and any craving

| Shwe Oo Min Dhammasukha Tawya: Vassa 2014 Interviews File: R05_0009 (12:45-14:10)

Why do you like ice cream so much? Because of idea – if it is no good, how do you feel? You don’t know yet but you already like it because of old idea; because of memory, you already like past experience. Memory is working, but you don’t know and you think it must be good, so you like it.

What do you like about ice cream? Sweet, cold? Every time you eat ice cream – ask: what does craving like about this food? You have some idea – taste, color or something – already the mind likes something. You can check; taste, is it really good?

You can watch, you can learn.

Watch – don’t think too much

| Shwe Oo Min Dhammasukha Tawya: Vassa 2014 Interviews (24:17-25:52)

Yogi: One day I was running late for meal and anxiety arose. I would usually respond in 3 ways:

1. Tell myself ‘You have to accept; you’re here right now and you will get to the line when you get to the line’.
2. Is this anxiety beneficial?
3. Watch the process with awareness

Sayadaw: The third is the best because when you try to be aware of the process, naturally you’ll learn something and then you’ll have the answer to the first 2 questions.

If you’re thinking, you’re not trying to learn from the experience. If you’re trying to solve the anxiety problem by thinking, it is only intellectual understanding, not understanding it experientially. It is better to watch the process; then the answer to ‘should or should not’ would come naturally.

That’s better; no need to think too much.

RELAXING IS MEDITATION TOO

| Shwe Oo Min Dhammasukha Tawya 2014 Vassa File: R5_0001 (11:41-13:10)

[Yogi's Note: Relaxing, letting go of craving, is also part of meditation – if you don’t feel good about meditation, then who wants to meditate?]

Sayadaw: Relax, don’t hurry. You let go of craving – letting go of craving is also part of meditation.

Right effort is perseverance, moment to moment, not hard effort. Patience and perseverance; don’t give up – gently, gently, not forcing or using a lot of energy.

You don’t do too much in meditation – just using mental energy to be present.

Feeling good is very important in meditation; you must feel good about meditation. If you don’t, then nobody wants to meditate; if it’s so tiring, who wants to meditate? Right?

You need to understand the nature of thoughts

| Vassa 2014 Interviews File: R05_0008 (8:10-9:23)

So, we need to know about the nature of thinking. Whenever we try to be aware of the thinking mind, automatically we pay attention to the story line, the concept.

When we practice again and again to be aware of the thoughts, slowly the mind understands that thinking mind or something is happening. Slowly, the mind understands that it is object, something happening. Then the mind understands more about the nature of the mind. Then we can separate what is concept and what is nature.

When the mind understands more about nature, the mind settles down because nature is nobody there. And also, nature is cause and effect process.

How can I let go of my worries?

| Shwe Oo Min Dhammasukha Tawya: Malaysian and Chinese Group Interview 2017 – Jan 14 (1:46:10-1:47:40)

You cannot let go. You don’t watch him, you need to watch yourself; then you can let go. Otherwise, you always pay attention to him, and then your anxiety and worry increase.

Later, every time you watch your husband, this anxious and worrying mind will arise; the pattern is already there. You allow this pattern to happen again and again; then you always look at your husband with a worrying mind because it has become a habit. So, next time you don’t watch his face. Whenever you see his face, you come back and pay attention to your own mind.

So, come back, come back, and come back. He can do his job; you do your job. He and you are different. He is he and you are you.

If you want to let go, you need to watch your mind. Otherwise, if something happens, you’ll have more worries and no idea how to help.

If you are more relaxed then you can find a way to help your husband. You can think of a good way; so take care of yourself first.

Don’t beat yourself up when awareness falls asleep

| USA Maui Retreat 2016 Morning Instructions 2016-11/16 (15:53-16:21)

When we don’t understand the nature of the mind, that it comes and goes; sometimes it’s here, sometimes it’s not here; sometimes you’re able to be aware, sometimes you’re not.

When you’re not accepting of the nature of the mind, we start trying too hard; we think we need to fix it.

Instead, we just remember that we’re back in the moment and just start again, just be aware again.

Coping with long-term emotional problems

| China Retreat 2014 Q&A (3 March 2014 PM; 59:09 – 1:03:08)

Now you know that your mind cannot watch objectively. First, you must acknowledge this situation. Then continue to be aware of this process (thinking and emotion) again and again until wisdom arises. It takes time. Because the old habit is strong, attachment to the idea is already there. You cannot change in a short time. We don’t know when the change can happen; but depending on your level of practice, wisdom can grow.

In my battle with depression, it took 2-3 years to truly understand why the mind suffered so much.

Now you try to think that the emotional problem is nature, it doesn’t belong to you. But this is not your understanding. It is second hand knowledge – you use other people’s understanding first. It is not your understanding yet; that’s why the mind still believes that this mind is ‘me’, feeling is ‘me’, body is ‘me’. Then you notice ‘Oh, the mind is still attached’. That’s it; just recognizing what is happening.

You must recognize that there is ‘I’, there is ‘I’. But when the ‘I’ disappears, at that time it is very obvious in the mind. Then only it becomes your own understanding.

Walking meditation

| China Retreat 2014 Introduction Talk

When you walk, do you recognise that you’re walking? Knowing that you’re walking is also awareness. Don’t control your action by either slowing down or walking fast. Just walk naturally and recognise your action as much as you can.

The Buddha’s teaching is the middle way – we’re not trying to walk fast or slow, just natural speed and recognize whatever is happening in the present moment. We’re learning how to practice from this retreat and apply it in your daily life when you return home.

In daily life, nobody walks very slowly, just natural speed. If you walk slowly here, you can’t apply it in your daily life.

In the beginning, you can start with noticing the movement of your legs or the touching of your feet. And slowly when you are aware continuously, you can know the movement of the whole body.

| Kalaw Retreat 2016 Day 6 Dhamma Discussion Group D (29:36-29:49)

When your hand is moving, you know that the hand is moving; when looking, you know that you’re looking; when your leg is moving, you know that the leg is moving, – you are practicing to stay in the present moment. It is helping your awareness to be continuous, to build up staying in the present moment continuously.

[Yogi's note: Remember that you’re trying to be aware, not trying to walk.]

Mindful talking

| Spirit Rock 2015 Retreat Morning Instruction Day 11 (27:00-39:28)

Before we begin speaking, we can know what we want to say, how we feel; and when we start speaking we can know the tone of our voice, what we’re thinking of saying, and how we feel again. And that is not all that we can know when we’re talking.

If you have a strong desire to convey something, there is eagerness, there is a great desire to speak out, then we can get carried away by that. That thought and that speech – we need to be careful of that energy. Watch it first.

Why is it difficult to be mindful when we speak is because so many things are happening so quickly when we speak. We think about what we want to say, we have ideas, our feelings and our thoughts, we pay attention to the person we’re speaking to, and there are views and all in the mix. It takes a lot of skill to just be and know whatever you know and not get lost and sucked into the whole process.

We also tend to pay a lot of attention to the other person we’re speaking to instead of to ourselves. But if we put too much attention on one place, then it will be taken away from another. So, we need to build this skill of how we can speak and know that we’re speaking and how we are speaking. And that is possible if we’re relaxed and not in a hurry to speak, not in a hurry to convey.

There is something called force of habit. So, if you were very diligent about being mindful every time you walk, then you’ll find that when you start walking, your mindfulness will just pop up because that’s what you have been diligently trying to cultivate. In the same way, if we always try to set up the intention to be mindful when we speak again and again, if this is what we’re diligent about, it comes to the point that when we speak mindfulness is there.

Here in retreat we don’t need to speak all day long and you don’t want to lose the momentum of mindfulness if you’re not skilful at speaking. So, although you can speak at any time of the day, do not speak for a long period of time any time you speak. So, limit yourself to short conversations; just to check in and practice being mindful while you speak.

This is for training, to build habit; so, you’re on retreat and there’s no need to jump into natural conversation. Take it easy and slow. Both of you know your purpose; so you can slow down. Know what you want to say, know when you’re speaking, take turns.
And when you speak about the Dhamma, about your practice, that also keeps you in the practice in the moment.

If you start speaking about yourself be extra vigilant because we’re most likely to be carried away when we speak about ourselves.

If there’s mindfulness throughout the time you’re speaking, you’ll find that you feel good after that. And if you’re mindful every time you speak, you’ll find that you feel more and more confident and sure about yourself. Even if you make a mistake in your speech, you’ll know it and you can learn a lesson from it immediately and decide how you won’t want to do it next time; so that you’re prepared.

If there’s a lot of reaction in the mind, your mind is very agitated, it’s better to not speak; watch the agitation and reaction and calm yourself down first because if we speak when we’re reacting, the tendency is to just shoot our mouth off.

So, we’re practising to learn how to only speak without defilements; that takes vigilance. So, wisdom, willingness, all these we will learn. We can speak with metta, with karuna. It’s not ideal to be speaking under the influence of unwholesome minds.

Now it’s the chance on a retreat to take it slow and see how it goes so that you get a taste of doing it at a measured pace, and you can bring that practice with you back into your lives.

Breaking retreat and taking the practice home

| Spirit Rock 2015 Retreat Morning Instruction Day 13 (2:08-12:35)

When we talk more, we find that we have more thinking after that as well. And the thinking mind needs to be seen as an object. When there is thinking, that there are thoughts, is not an indication of whether the mind has samadhi or not. Just because the mind is thinking doesn’t mean that the mind has lost samadhi.

Samadhi is in the observing mind; being able to watch steadily is samadhi. If you’re able to maintain awareness, it means that there is samadhi.

In this next day the level of activity is going to start increasing, you’ll find yourself planning more, deciding what to do, there is a lot of cleaning and packing to do; but remember no matter how much there is to get done, you can only do one thing at a time.

How do you do this, go through this day without losing awareness? The mind’s habit is to put all its attention outwards when it feels it has something that it has to get done. We lose mindfulness when we put too much energy into thinking about what to do and how to get it done. But we can do it without losing mindfulness.

So, if mentally we don’t have the sense of hurry, if mentally we can relax and take one thing at a time, then we can maintain awareness. Whatever we do, we can know how we feel as we do it, our state of mind, and what is happening in the mind as we do it.

We have a choice of so many things to be aware of that might be suitable for ourselves. We can be aware of the mind as we do what we do; we can be aware of the state of mind as we do things; we can be aware of the calmness or the steadiness of mind as we do things; it’s our choice.

And we have to do this at home too. This is how we need to continue to practice at home.

To only be able to practice and meditate when there is nothing else to do, that’s for beginners. But as we gain ground in practice, we should aim to bring the practice into all facets of our lives; to become skilful at maintaining awareness in every situation and context.

It is not only when the body is still and not moving that the mind can develop samadhi. We can be moving and still develop samadhi because samadhi is something that is developed through the activity of the mind, not the body. Even a runner probably has great samadhi; if the awareness is there, there will be samadhi.

When we have the right attitude and we are aware continuously, there will be samadhi no matter what work we do. Let the mind and body do what they do naturally; it just needs to be seen, that’s all.