The object is still the same, same thing that you have been noticing all the time, but suddenly you understand it totally differently.
When the mind is pure, suddenly from the view of delusion, it switches to the view of wisdom; it has right view. Suddenly, it has a totally different view – it sees things as it is.
Any insight we have is quite shocking.
Yogi: It’s useful to develop one-pointed concentration and then open up to vipassana mode.
Sayadaw: Yes, it’s possible. But, it’s always important for samadhi to be matched with its level of wisdom. Samma samadhi means right or wise concentration – so, always pair it with wisdom; then the effects are wholesome.
If wisdom is not there, then it’s possible for greed or aversion to come in and work with the samadhi and then the effects can be quite devastating.
Yogi: Usually, when something happens, the concentration latches onto it.
Sayadaw: Yes, it can be very bad and it can become dangerous – if it is fear, it may trigger a panic attack.
Yogi: I do anapana but I cannot watch in a relaxed natural way. The mind always wants to control the breath.
Sayadaw: If you cannot watch your breath naturally, place your awareness in your chest area. Then you can notice something happening there – whether it’s relaxed or tense or if the mind is happy. You don’t have to try to do anything – it’s already happening.
You can also know your mind state easily if you watch your chest area. In this area, you can know whether you’re happy, sad, or angry.
There is always some tension in the chest when we’re not very relaxed. So, it is obvious to watch this area naturally without much effort.
If you can only practice when you’re on the cushion, try to know that you’re walking whenever you’re walking. That’s more meaningful because you can then bring your practice to daily activities.
When you practice knowing that you’re walking in daily activities, slowly, the awareness becomes a habit whenever you walk.
Every time we walk, awareness comes back because it has become a habit.
So, try to practice every time you walk. This is your homework – the next time I return, you need to report your progress.
Only one thing – every time you walk, try to be mindful. That’s enough.
When the mind is stronger, it can be aware of more subtle objects, or choose to be aware of the subtle objects.
Your mind already knows how to be aware of obvious objects. Between the obvious and the subtle object, choose and stay with the subtle object.
When the awareness becomes stronger, the subtle objects become obvious.
Yogi: Is there a resistance in the body to going to the awareness?
Sayadaw: Resistance is something that the mind does. Whatever we feel in the mind gets reflected in the body as sensations – that might be what you’re detecting.
Yogi: Should I look at the tension in the body?
Sayadaw: Yes, you can.
Yogi: I’m not sure if I’m practicing or not. I’m aware of something but I’m not sure if there’s enough effort, or it has become a bit natural.
Sayadaw: If the awareness is present, then you can know what the awareness is aware of – there is an object and the awareness. And then, you can differentiate whether the object is a concept or reality. So, check when the mind is unsure if awareness is present or not.
The objects are just mind and body – in the body they are the senses; and in the mind, the feelings or the thinking.
On retreat, just strengthen the mindfulness; and as the momentum grows, the mind will be more confident about the practice.
The practice comes in phases and the first phase is gaining some continuity and momentum in the awareness.
If the awareness slides, we just have to build up the continuity of awareness again.
Yogi: I feel terribly restless today. I wasn’t sure what to do, so I went to rest and fell asleep.
Sayadaw: It’s important not to resist the experience because when you don’t like it and you don’t want it to happen it becomes stronger.
You can either change your attitude about what is happening or become aware of the attitude that you’re having (the mind is not happy...it’s still happening...this is how it feels in the body and mind).
The important thing is not to keep thinking of what’s happening.
If it doesn’t go away when you watch it, it’s no problem. You can watch something neutral like the touching sensation and not pay attention to it directly.
The important thing is not to let the mind keep judging and thinking about the restlessness.
Yogi: How do I know if my investigation/analysis is right or wrong? I’m confused.
Sayadaw: You have thought enough and it hasn’t helped – you should stop thinking.
The practice of awareness is not about thinking. When you’re aware, the mind is also gathering the information that you’re not conscious of.
The intelligence bit is just the wisdom of how to be aware. It is not thinking about what you’re being aware of. It’s just the intelligence of how to be aware.
When insight comes, it gives you an answer that is beyond what you can think about. And that’s what insight is – it is something that you cannot think about.
It is something that becomes understood beyond our current understanding.
You have thought enough – now you’re going to be aware. Every time you have this recurring thought, you’re going to recognize the thought and recognize how it feels to have this thought, again, again and over again – ‘thought, feeling, thought, feeling’ every moment. You’re not stopping the thought – just recognizing it and the associated feeling.
Doing this actually stabilizes the mind, and at some point, wisdom will bring all the gathered information together and tell you something. When? We don’t know.
Yogi: If everything is cause and effect and there’s no free will, then why don’t I just indulge in my greed all the time? It’ll go away eventually or it won’t; it’s just conditions eventually.
Sayadaw: We understand cause and effect incorrectly if we think that it is just an independent process because in every moment we create conditions for the next event. And that’s where wisdom can choose or the unwholesome can choose.
If we choose the unwholesome all the time, then there are the effects of the unwholesome; and if we choose the wholesome, there will be those effects.
What wisdom is doing is that it is trying to understand the right conditions so that it can fulfill those conditions in every moment for wholesome results to arise.
One definition of anatta is that we cannot control things. What is misunderstood instead is that we cannot control the result. What is happening now is the result of past conditions – and you can’t change that – but what you can change/choose are the present conditions. That’s why we practice meditation, or else, what is the point? If we choose the right current conditions, the result will be different.
That’s where we can exert control if we understand.
For example, when we choose to practice any of the Paramis – the 10 wholesome qualities of the mind that can be perfected – again and again, these qualities become more established in the mind, and they have their wholesome results.
Yogi: I notice that my thoughts have different qualities and characteristics – some are ‘Blah! Blah! Blah!’ and others are dhammic. How may I understand them?
Sayadaw: A thought is just a thought – it is neither wholesome nor unwholesome because thinking is a function of the mind.
When we first watch the mind, we notice the thoughts and the feelings. When we have something unwholesome in the mind and we say that we’re angry, we try to look at anger and the first thing that we meet are the angry thoughts and the feelings that come with anger. But, that’s not anger.
The thought is just a thought and the feeling is just a feeling. Just as when we’re happy, we have happy thoughts and we have happy feelings, but they are not the happiness.
At first we see the thoughts and the feelings and think that they are the anger; but later we begin to recognize that there’s something behind – there’s an operating quality that is driving and conditioning the feelings and the thoughts. These qualities work through the feelings and the thoughts to express themselves, but they’re not the thoughts and the feelings.
Thoughts and feelings are functions of the mind that allow the mind quality to be expressed.
When wisdom arises, there’ll be wise thoughts. Wisdom acts through thoughts to give you wise thoughts, and there are different feelings in the body and in the mind.
Every one of these wholesome and unwholesome qualities has its own characteristics – anger makes the mind think and feel in certain ways, and likewise greed, wisdom, happiness, sadness, anxiety, worry, metta and gratitude. All of them have their characteristics that are separate from the thoughts and feelings.
The words are different because the meanings are different which means their natures are different.
The more we observe them, the more information we gather about them, the more we understand them and how each of their characteristics function and also understand more about what a feeling is and what a thought is.
I grew wisdom simply, like holding my tongue when I wanted to say something to somebody and realizing that it wasn’t the place and time to do so.
I saw the person passed by my shop, but I had already understood that it was not the right time and place to talk – so, I let it go. Recognizing that the mind had that wisdom to let go of the desire to speak because it was more beneficial not to speak at that time and place, it felt really good.
Every time we do the right thing, the mind feels good, it feels more confident.
Whether the sadness (or any strong defilement) goes away or not is not important; what matters is we’re watching the way the mind interacts with itself – how thoughts affect our emotions.
If the mind understands how thoughts affect our emotions, if we can see that connection, then it becomes useful in all aspects of our lives whenever emotions arise.
One of my favorite aspects of wisdom is understanding how to instantly calm the mind when it is disturbed; how to deal with any defilement like sadness, worry, or anger.
The more you understand the nature of this mind and body, the more the mind understands how to handle the body and the mind.
When I was depressed and trying to practice at home, this question kept coming to me: ‘Why is the mind suffering?’
It was very clear to me that the mind didn’t understand and that was why it was suffering. Therefore, I constantly watched the mind.
Wisdom is when it’s clear, when the mind understands how to do something and when to do something.
Yogi: A deep sadness arises during meditation and I know why I’m sad.
Sayadaw: We often think that the external reason – something that happens in our life – makes us sad, but we don’t recognize the internal reason.
When we consider something to be sad – when the mind has decided that this is a sad event or situation – that’s what makes the mind sad. It’s how the mind views something that gives it emotion.
So, if you think that something shouldn’t be the way it is, you will be angry. If you think ‘I wonder if this will happen and I don’t want that to happen’, you will feel anxiety or worry.
So, it’s how the mind thinks that will create the emotion.
In fact, no external event makes this mind sad or happy. It’s what the mind thinks of what is happening that makes this mind happy or sad.
When we don’t see the entire process, from the way we think to the way we feel, then we think that what is happening outside is what makes us feel this way.
When it comes to emotions – whether sadness, worry, anxiety, or anger – it is very important to not only recognize the feelings but also the thoughts. Then we see that when the thoughts are happening one way, so too the feelings. When the thoughts are different, the feelings are different too. We then start to see the direct connection between how thoughts influence our emotions.