Check attitude when observing the suffering mind

| USA Maui Retreat 2016 Q&A 2016-11/18 (1:26:57-1:27:42)

Regardless of the suffering and its qualifications, it is the object; it is not important. What is important is to check the attitude – what is the mind’s attitude towards this suffering and what is the quality of the awareness.

These are the 2 important things. You only need to take care of the attitude; take care as in know what the attitude is and know what the quality of the awareness is. That is all that you need to take care of; you don’t need to take care of the suffering.

Learning why the wrong is unhelpful by watching

| USA Maui Retreat 2016 Q&A 2016-11/18 (45:43-47:14)

If we’re having a wrong attitude, all we have to do is recognize that; acknowledge it. ‘Oh! I’m having a wrong attitude anew. Oh, the wrong attitude is still here; I still want it to go away; wanting it to go away feels like this and like that.’ Just being with the moment; no longer trying to get it right.

Just seeing what the mind is doing, right or wrong. Because it is the process of seeing the mind do something wrong again and again that teaches the mind why it doesn’t want to do that anymore; then the mind learns, and then the mind on its own when it learns, it doesn’t go there anymore.

But if we don’t allow the mind to learn that lesson, if we don’t go through that, it will always try to get it right. We don’t learn why the wrong is unhelpful in a balanced way.

When we understand that it’s unhelpful, we keep away, not because we don’t like it, but because the mind knows that it doesn’t need to go there anymore.

That takes time.

What wisdom is not afraid to die?

| Shwe Oo Min Dhammasukha Tawya: Winter 2016 Malaysian and Chinese Group Interviews 170114 (1:47:43-1:48:37)

If you realize impermanence and cause and effect very strong, no problem; dying is nature.

Passing away is dying, right? If you really understand impermanence, no problem about dying because understanding impermanence is already understanding dying.

You are always dying moment to moment, right?

Only understanding rupa & nama and cause & effect, you are not afraid. If you really understand what is rupa and what is nama, right?

Depends on understanding level; these 2 levels (the first 2 insight knowledges) are enough if you really understand them.

Fear of death

| Shwe Oo Min Dhammasukha Tawya: Vassa 2014 Interviews File: R05_0010 (1:05:30-1:06:17)

When you see object and mind, what is you? You think object and mind is you. When you see object and mind passing away, you’re dying already. Every time you see passing away is dying.

Dying is nature; but we think this object and mind is ‘me’. Now, we see object and mind disappearing again and again; we’re dying all the time. Small, small dying and big dying.

When you can understand the small dying, you can accept the big dying. If we can understand the small dying very well, big dying is no problem. This is a natural process.

You cannot experience your body directly

| Kalaw 2016 Retreat – 2016-03/31 Day 4 Dhamma Group Discussion Group D (07:19-10:35)

You need to know what is concept and what is nature/reality. When you watch your hand, you cannot be aware of your hand; you can only think about it. Hand has shape, form and colour; the mind can only think about these, they are concepts. You can directly experience hardness and softness, movement, warmth and cold; these are nature. Concept means the mind starts to think about distance, direction – up and down, left and right, form, shape, colour, name and time; we call these concepts.

If your mind pays attention only to the concept, it is easier for reaction – liking and disliking – to arise. Liking and disliking, anger, craving and delusion mind always pay attention to concepts. Because of habit, ordinary mind always pays attention to concepts; for example, when we try to be aware of seeing, immediately we think about seeing things – man, woman, tree, cars – these are all concepts. Seeing is nature; can see something is nature. After seeing, we think, we give meaning to what we see; it is perception, what we call concept. After this concept, we pay more attention to the concept.

The concept is not real; reality or nature is direct experience. So we cannot know our leg; we can know the pain, or hardness and softness, the touching sensation. That’s the difference between concept and nature.

For example, thinking – the story line is concept; we’re thinking of whom, where or when. But the thinking mind that is happening or working is nature. Now, we’re trying to understand this physical and mental process. We try to be aware of the mind state, not the storyline. If you pay attention to the storyline, immediately happiness, sadness or anger arises. For example, someone we dislike comes, immediately we get angry.

Wisdom is on the awareness side, not experience side

| Shwe Oo Min Dhammasukha Tawya: Vassa 2014 Interviews File: R05_0009 1:35:16-1:36:12)

Wisdom can know what it is; can see what it is. Wisdom is on the awareness side; not experience side. Only wisdom can understand what is right and what is wrong; what is wholesome and what is unwholesome.

Awareness just recognises what is happening. Awareness only knows the experience. When awareness is obvious, it is just obvious; you cannot say that it is wisdom.

[Elsewhere] The object can be suffering but the watching mind is equanimous. This is vipassana.

When watching defilements brings suffering

| Shwe Oo Min Dhammasukha Tawya: Vassa 2014 Interviews File: R05_0009 (1:03:02-1:04:45)

Yogi: Continuing to watch aversion and craving brings a lot of suffering

Sayadaw: Important thing about vipassana is that you have right view and watch – the object can be suffering but the watching mind is equanimous. This is vipassana.

Face the experience; longer and longer, you become more skillful. People don’t want to face their suffering experience, that’s why the practice cannot mature.

Only if you cannot face the experience, then you can use a neutral object like anapana. If you can face, better to face the experience.

Vipassana is facing the experience and learning something from it. Face the situation; stay with it, not running away, and learn something – like a toll gate, you get money from any car passing through. Mind state is like this – let whatever happen and you get the benefit.

Advice for monastics and elders

| Shwe Oo Min Dhammasukha Tawya: Vassa 2014 Interviews File: R05_0009 (17:24-18:26)

Whatever they want, people give. Slowly, they don’t notice about this mind, they become more attached; so, monks and nuns need to know more about the mind.

In our Buddhist world, people respect monks a lot. Every time you get respect, unconsciously the mind likes it – and slowly, the mind becomes proud.

If you don’t get respect next time, you become angry. You have to be careful because people respect and give you first. If you don’t notice your mind, every time unconsciously the mind enjoys, likes it and becomes happy. And slowly, the habit becomes very strong, and later whenever you cannot get first, you become angry.

Ice cream and any craving

| Shwe Oo Min Dhammasukha Tawya: Vassa 2014 Interviews File: R05_0009 (12:45-14:10)

Why do you like ice cream so much? Because of idea – if it is no good, how do you feel? You don’t know yet but you already like it because of old idea; because of memory, you already like past experience. Memory is working, but you don’t know and you think it must be good, so you like it.

What do you like about ice cream? Sweet, cold? Every time you eat ice cream – ask: what does craving like about this food? You have some idea – taste, color or something – already the mind likes something. You can check; taste, is it really good?

You can watch, you can learn.

Watch – don’t think too much

| Shwe Oo Min Dhammasukha Tawya: Vassa 2014 Interviews (24:17-25:52)

Yogi: One day I was running late for meal and anxiety arose. I would usually respond in 3 ways:

1. Tell myself ‘You have to accept; you’re here right now and you will get to the line when you get to the line’.
2. Is this anxiety beneficial?
3. Watch the process with awareness

Sayadaw: The third is the best because when you try to be aware of the process, naturally you’ll learn something and then you’ll have the answer to the first 2 questions.

If you’re thinking, you’re not trying to learn from the experience. If you’re trying to solve the anxiety problem by thinking, it is only intellectual understanding, not understanding it experientially. It is better to watch the process; then the answer to ‘should or should not’ would come naturally.

That’s better; no need to think too much.

RELAXING IS MEDITATION TOO

| Shwe Oo Min Dhammasukha Tawya 2014 Vassa File: R5_0001 (11:41-13:10)

[Yogi's Note: Relaxing, letting go of craving, is also part of meditation – if you don’t feel good about meditation, then who wants to meditate?]

Sayadaw: Relax, don’t hurry. You let go of craving – letting go of craving is also part of meditation.

Right effort is perseverance, moment to moment, not hard effort. Patience and perseverance; don’t give up – gently, gently, not forcing or using a lot of energy.

You don’t do too much in meditation – just using mental energy to be present.

Feeling good is very important in meditation; you must feel good about meditation. If you don’t, then nobody wants to meditate; if it’s so tiring, who wants to meditate? Right?

You need to understand the nature of thoughts

| Vassa 2014 Interviews File: R05_0008 (8:10-9:23)

So, we need to know about the nature of thinking. Whenever we try to be aware of the thinking mind, automatically we pay attention to the story line, the concept.

When we practice again and again to be aware of the thoughts, slowly the mind understands that thinking mind or something is happening. Slowly, the mind understands that it is object, something happening. Then the mind understands more about the nature of the mind. Then we can separate what is concept and what is nature.

When the mind understands more about nature, the mind settles down because nature is nobody there. And also, nature is cause and effect process.

How can I let go of my worries?

| Shwe Oo Min Dhammasukha Tawya: Malaysian and Chinese Group Interview 2017 – Jan 14 (1:46:10-1:47:40)

You cannot let go. You don’t watch him, you need to watch yourself; then you can let go. Otherwise, you always pay attention to him, and then your anxiety and worry increase.

Later, every time you watch your husband, this anxious and worrying mind will arise; the pattern is already there. You allow this pattern to happen again and again; then you always look at your husband with a worrying mind because it has become a habit. So, next time you don’t watch his face. Whenever you see his face, you come back and pay attention to your own mind.

So, come back, come back, and come back. He can do his job; you do your job. He and you are different. He is he and you are you.

If you want to let go, you need to watch your mind. Otherwise, if something happens, you’ll have more worries and no idea how to help.

If you are more relaxed then you can find a way to help your husband. You can think of a good way; so take care of yourself first.

Don’t beat yourself up when awareness falls asleep

| USA Maui Retreat 2016 Morning Instructions 2016-11/16 (15:53-16:21)

When we don’t understand the nature of the mind, that it comes and goes; sometimes it’s here, sometimes it’s not here; sometimes you’re able to be aware, sometimes you’re not.

When you’re not accepting of the nature of the mind, we start trying too hard; we think we need to fix it.

Instead, we just remember that we’re back in the moment and just start again, just be aware again.

Coping with long-term emotional problems

| China Retreat 2014 Q&A (3 March 2014 PM; 59:09 – 1:03:08)

Now you know that your mind cannot watch objectively. First, you must acknowledge this situation. Then continue to be aware of this process (thinking and emotion) again and again until wisdom arises. It takes time. Because the old habit is strong, attachment to the idea is already there. You cannot change in a short time. We don’t know when the change can happen; but depending on your level of practice, wisdom can grow.

In my battle with depression, it took 2-3 years to truly understand why the mind suffered so much.

Now you try to think that the emotional problem is nature, it doesn’t belong to you. But this is not your understanding. It is second hand knowledge – you use other people’s understanding first. It is not your understanding yet; that’s why the mind still believes that this mind is ‘me’, feeling is ‘me’, body is ‘me’. Then you notice ‘Oh, the mind is still attached’. That’s it; just recognizing what is happening.

You must recognize that there is ‘I’, there is ‘I’. But when the ‘I’ disappears, at that time it is very obvious in the mind. Then only it becomes your own understanding.