IT TAKES TIME TO GROW THE MOTIVATION TO BE AWARE

Swiss Retreat 2019 Group Interviews 6 (00:12-2:50)

Yogi: Sometimes I’m aware, sometimes I’m not aware, and sometimes, I’m not sure. Other times, I don’t want to be aware. It takes an effort to go against this habit. Can I have another attitude that allows me to be aware, or is it a luxury to be aware?

Sayadaw: The mind doesn’t want to be aware because delusion doesn’t really want to be aware. It’s only when we use some wisdom like ‘we really should try to be aware’, but delusion will prefer us not to be aware so that it can do whatever it wants.

So both motivations – the motivation to be aware and the motivation to not be aware – will be present and competing.

We need more understanding about awareness so that the motivation to be aware will grow stronger; and it takes time.

WHEN EVERYTHING FEELS LIKE THE SAME OLD THING

Swiss Retreat 2019 Group Interviews 6 (1:26:34-1:28:08)

Yogi: The mind is dull and it feels like everything is old.

Sayadaw: When we start to feel that the practice is not fresh and light, we need to check our attitude. Is the mind wanting something? 

You check your attitude and now you see your attitude – the mind doesn’t like the present moment. So, you now have to start watching the aversion. 

We just take what we are given – this is the present moment and we take that.

If we keep on comparing the dullness with the morning freshness, we’ll keep going in circles for days. We don’t need to want what we had in the morning; we just need to be aware of the present moment as it is.

Yogi: I was thinking that I was doing something wrong.

Sayadaw: There is no need to be good; we only need to be aware.

THE MIND CAN’T BE SEEN WHEN TOO EAGER TO LOOK FOR IT

Swiss Retreat 2019 Group Interviews 5 (1:18:08-1:19:39)

Yogi: I was fascinated by the attitude of my mind and had been watching that, but now I couldn’t find it. 

Sayadaw: It’s already there and you probably don’t have to search for it. Because the mind is too eager, you couldn’t see it – just lay down the desires, and simply start anew from the body.

If you have seen those attitudes over the years, they will come up anew. 

When we look for the mind, sometimes it hides from us and if you don’t look for it, you just stay in the present moment, it’ll put itself in front of you. 

BEAUTY IS A CONCEPT

Swiss Retreat 2019 Group Interviews 4 (58:20-59:30)

Yogi: When I’m outside and am aware of seeing, everything is equal, but often there are things that catch my attention that are beautiful. Is beauty always a concept?

Sayadaw: It is a value judgment of the mind because what you find beautiful somebody else may find ugly or neutral. 

Beauty is a concept; so, it’s not a reality. If it was a reality, everyone would experience it the same way. 

If someone likes red, then red is beautiful. If someone likes blue, blue is beautiful. 

RECOGNIZE THE BENEFIT OF AWARENESS IN THE PRESENT MOMENT

Swiss Retreat 2019 Group Interviews 4 (44:20-50:35)

Yogi: I have been practicing at home, but I notice there’s still a big gap between the retreat practice and practice in daily life. I think it’s because I talk a lot in everyday life. 

Is it possible to have the same calmness and tidiness of mind in daily life?

Sayadaw: Now that you practice more at home than you used to, do you feel a difference? Is there a sense that it is more beneficial? That the mind is more stable?

Instead of reaching for a goal, think of the present moment. For me, when I was mindful, it was a little better than just being depressed. 

Rely on what your present moment experience is – is it better than not being mindful? Is this much mindful better than being less mindful than this? 

Let that motivate you to be mindful.

ATTACHMENT TO THINKING

Swiss Retreat 2019 Group Interviews 5 (1:20:05-1:21:23)

Yogi: This attachment to thinking is frightening. How do I get rid of it? It feels like we’re human thinking and not human beings.

Sayadaw: We need mindfulness and wisdom. When there is enough wisdom, the mind will know what is enough – what is necessary to think of and what is unnecessary or tormenting thinking. 

We do have a lot of attachment to thinking – it makes us feel real and validated.

MEDITATION IS TRAINING THE MIND

Swiss Retreat 2019 Group Interviews 5 (1:14:58-1:16:49)

Yogi: How do we work with mental suffering – like the mind latching onto thoughts and how to work with that?

Sayadaw: The practice of meditation is a discipline – it’s training the mind so that we don’t have to suffer the things that the mind willfully wants to do like causing us to think again and again about something that we really don’t want to suffer from. But if we don’t train the mind, we don’t have the option to stop that suffering.

When we train the mind, that option becomes available to us because now the mind knows how to pay attention to an object, how to place the mind here or there, how to observe a feeling and not get lost in the thinking, or how to have right attitude. All those help to deal with hurtful thoughts.

Each of the exercises that we do will help to deal with that.

NOTICE THAT THOUGHTS ARE HAPPENING

20200209 Not let it think, let it know // Sayadaw U Tejaniya‘s Dhamma Interview (2:08-3:30) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fOLAomXcl6A

Yogi: I could be aware of walking, sensations and thinking at the same time. I thought I should only be aware of the walking.

Sayadaw: Don’t focus only on the walking. Because your awareness is sharp, it can pay attention to walking and still know the thoughts.

Your awareness is good, but the problem is that you don’t like the thoughts. 

Yogi: What should I do when I see the thoughts?

Sayadaw: Let the mind know. 

Yogi: Let the mind think?

Sayadaw: No, not let the mind think, but let the mind know that thinking is happening.

You’re not deliberately thinking, right? It just comes; so, you’re not responsible for it. You just intentionally try to be aware – try to notice that thinking is happening.

AWARENESS WITH AND WITHOUT WISDOM

Swiss Retreat 2019 Group Interviews 6 (1:03:45-1:07:53)

Yogi: I’m not sure what you mean by awareness. I experience 2 levels of awareness – when I’m just feeling the sensations and when the watching mind sees me feeling the sensations.

Sayadaw: When you get to that watching mind where there’s freedom and you can know anything, that’s not only awareness, there’s also wisdom there. There’s already wisdom there; that’s why it feels so free and it can know so much so easily.

Once that wisdom fades, you feel yourself down again and just feeling the sensations.

Yogi: To get to the second level, I have to start over again.

Sayadaw: Yes, you always start at the bottom and you work yourself to the top again.

TRAINING TO KNOW THE AWARENESS

20200209 Not let it think, let it know // Sayadaw U Tejaniya‘s Dhamma Interview (3:50-5:20) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fOLAomXcl6A

Yogi: I have been using an anchor object like the breath to keep me in the present and then I can also notice thoughts, sounds and body warmth. But when I try to notice the awareness, I get trapped into thinking about the awareness.

Sayadaw: You can already notice many objects; so, just ask yourself ‘is awareness present or not?’ If you just ask, the mind will then notice if awareness is present.

Don’t try too much or you’ll start to think more. Naturally the mind can know; just reminding with a question is enough.

CONCENTRATION PRACTICE IMPROVES BY KNOWING THE MIND

Swiss Retreat 2019 Group Interviews 6 (11:30-16:03)

Yogi: I have done concentration practice and sometimes the energy rises very high in the body into the head and I end up with a headache. And at the end of the day on retreat, it’s hard to sleep because everything is heightened. 

But I don’t find that happening with awareness-wisdom practice. Can Sayadaw give some advice when I do concentration practice?

Sayadaw: You need to hold a single object loosely when you use it. I don’t recommend holding on for dear life when you use any single object. 

The key is balance really. When we look at a single object, we can get a little intense. It is because we don’t know the way the mind is working to place itself on that object again and again.

If we were simply placing the attention again and again, we’ll be fine, but if we start to press the mind onto the object, we’re using too much energy.

The energy gets too much when we’re always too much into the object. 

If we can see how much energy the mind uses to look at an object, then it can choose to reduce the energy when the tension builds up or put in more energy when it feels floaty.

It’s always best when the yogi can gauge their own level of effort and sati, or how they’re being aware. You can become much skillful at practicing when you can tune in to that.

DAYDREAMING ON THE CUSHION

Swiss Retreat 2019 Group Interviews 5 (15:35-19:45)

Yogi: My mind keeps slipping away into daydreaming during the sit, and I really want to get out of the sitting. It doesn’t happen when I’m active. 

There are moments when I’m awake after struggling, but do I need to go through this fight?

Sayadaw: Day dreaming and night dreaming are the same – they’re thinking.

You need to give your mind work – your mind is idling during sitting meditation. In sitting meditation, the mind has less to do and not so alert. 

You need to direct the mind. Try to ask yourself constantly from the start of the sit: Am I thinking or am I aware? Check again and again if you’re thinking or aware.

DEALING WITH SLEEPINESS

Swiss Retreat 2019 Group Interviews 6 (23:33-25:15)

Yogi: I often get sleepy while sitting. I don’t want it to become a habit and try not to be sleepy, but it is difficult to accept sleepiness and not be averse because I don’t want to fall asleep. 

I do ask questions to ignite interest, but it is difficult.

Sayadaw: Just try and if you cannot, get up. Don’t stay sitting and sleepy. 

Yogi: I still feel sleepy when I stand. 

Sayadaw: Walk; and if you feel sleepy when you’re walking, go and sleep. And, sometimes you’ll be sleepy when you sit, stand and walk and when you finally go and sleep, you wake up.

If the mind is tired, you just need to let it rest.

AWARENESS AND OBJECT ARE DIFFERENT BUT THEY HAPPEN TOGETHER

Swiss Retreat 2019 Group Interviews 4 (40:43-41:40)

Yogi: Everything that I see, there is a knowing of what it is. I thought that they are 2 different things, yet they are always coming together. 

Sayadaw: Yes, they do happen together because they are part of the same process. 

Whatever happens doesn’t necessary happen one at a time. Many functions happen together; we’re just figuring out that one is a different nature and the other is a different nature but they’re happening together.

WHEN FINDING OUT WHY LEADS TO MORE THINKING

Swiss Retreat 2019 Group Interviews 4 (22:14-23:45)

Sayadaw: If you’re used to thinking, you don’t need to think now – you just need to observe with some curiosity. 

If there’s anger now, we’re not fixing the anger but observing what is anger, how does it work and what is it doing; and what do I know when I observe it. 

Just observe; don’t think about it. You need to observe for a long time before you get answers. You must be patient.

Yogi: I don’t have to know why I’m angry or why I’m anxious?

Sayadaw: No. First, you just need to observe continuously. 

Yogi: I find it difficult because the thinking of why I’m angry or anxious starts automatically.

Sayadaw: You acknowledge the thought and bring the mind back to the sensation and the feeling repeatedly.