PURE AWARENESS HAS NO MEANING

Swiss Retreat 2019 Group Interviews 6 (03:26-06:40) with Sayadaw U Tejaniya

Yogi: I was sitting and when I was hearing sound, it was frightening until I realized that it was someone pulling the curtain.

That got me thinking of awareness and concept – that without concept, we could be lost in awareness.

Sayadaw: You made a wrong conclusion from the experience – the experience you had when you were afraid was not pure awareness.

Your mind had already thought of some concept although it might not be a concept that you have a clear idea of.

That was not raw or pure awareness that was making you afraid – it was some wrong concept that the mind had.

THE AWARENESS IS THE REWARD, NOT THE RESULT

Swiss Retreat 2019 Group Interviews 6 (08:02-11:08) with Sayadaw U Tejaniya

Yogi: Today, I came to the conclusion that whatever the awareness is – however much there is and wherever it is – it’s good enough.

I feel that when we’re learning something new or practicing a new skill, the reward comes from the amount of effort we put in, right? More effort, more reward.

Here, I feel that this is incorrect – the effort is in being just remembering to come back to the awareness again and again, just the continuity, that’s where the effort is.

Sayadaw: Yes, that’s correct. If possible, just hang on to the awareness for dear life.

If you understand the awareness, then every moment, there is something that the mind knows. You can appreciate that.

For the yogi, the most important mind is the awareness.

WHEN WISDOM INCREASES, DOUBT DECREASES

Swiss Retreat 2019 Group Interviews 8 (46:00-47:48) with Sayadaw U Tejaniya

Yogi: How can I detect doubt before it moves to the house? How do I prevent doubt?

Sayadaw: It is not possible; but there is a principle that when there is more wisdom, there is less doubt. 

Doubt is a function of delusion – so, when there is more wisdom, there is less delusion hence less doubt. 

I agree that doubt is a difficult mind to have around and to live with. I have experienced it and we don’t really know what to do. We are left mired in doubt. 

HOW TO WATCH UNCLEAR OBJECTS

Swiss Retreat 2019 Group Interviews 7 (1:22:45-1:25:25)

Sayadaw: Why do you think the vibration is the mind?

Yogi: I say vibration because I cannot think of another word; also I cannot locate it in my body.

Sayadaw: Because you don’t know for sure, don’t think of it as the mind; just think that the vibration is an object.

You can say this is an object. Just consider it as an object and don’t go into it.

Don’t go closer to the object and don’t inspect the vibration. Stay with the awareness, stay knowing that the awareness is still present.

THE POWER OF RIGHT VIEW

Swiss Retreat 2019 Group Interviews 7 (49:30-51:28)

Yogi: My working meditation is chopping vegetables during the retreat.

Today, I suddenly realized that I was really bored chopping the same vegetables for a whole hour. I tried to find out what it was being bored and it was clearly aversion and wanting. I was thinking about cooking and was chopping faster to get rid of the boredom.

I then remembered Sayadaw saying that it was just aversion and to let it be. From then on, I chopped with joy.

Sayadaw: Sometimes the mind discovers how to ease itself.

You see how all these information and the awareness, they all work together.

WHY IS SHAME SO AWFUL?

Swiss Retreat 2019 Group Interviews 8 (50:00-53:17)

Yogi: Why is shame so awful? What can I do to diminish it?

Sayadaw: Because it affects the self-image. The self-image we try so hard to build is shattered momentarily and we’re afraid other people will see the shattered self-image; and so it feels awful.

We try to keep ourselves looking good and when we feel that what we have done is not good then it feels horrible.

Yogi: What do you think about laughing about the embarrassing incident afterwards?

Sayadaw: That’s like redeeming the self-image. We try to feel good again like it’s not that bad.

THE SENSE OF SELF INTENSIFIES THE DEFILEMENT

Swiss Retreat 2019 Group Interviews 8 (40:15-41:20)

Yogi: When the ‘I’ was not much there, I was afraid that I would lose compassion for myself and others. But I realize that I don’t have to be afraid of that.

Sayadaw: When there is more ‘I’, there is more unwholesomeness and the mind feels more of the grief and all that are part of aversion. It experiences more of the grief; if there is less ‘I’, it feels less painful.

HOW SHOULD THE MIND INVESTIGATE?

Swiss Retreat 2019 Group Interviews 4 (20:00-23:45) with Sayadaw U Tejaniya

Yogi: Today, I was lost how to look at anger – maybe I want to fix it too much.

Sayadaw: Investigate means to make us look carefully at what we’re observing; and it is not to think about or analyze what we’re observing, but just to make us observe it carefully for an extended period of time.

If you’re used to thinking, you don’t need to think now – the way you want to position the mind to observe is a curiosity, not to fix the anger, but to check what anger is, how it works and what it does.

Yogi: So, I just look at the anger and find out what it does with me in my body and mind?

Sayadaw: But just observe and not think about it. You need to observe for a long time to get answers – you need to be patient.

Yogi: I don’t have to know why I’m angry and anxious.

Sayadaw: No. First, we just need to observe it continuously.

Yogi: I find it difficult because automatically I’ll think about why I’m angry and anxious.

Sayadaw: Just acknowledge the thought and bring it back to the sensation and feeling again and again. Try to do that.

ON COMPASSION

Swiss Retreat 2019 Group Interviews 8 (37:27-41:22)

Yogi: I’m confused between sadness and compassion – I’m afraid that I’ll lose compassion without sadness. Perhaps I don’t understand what compassion is because if I see someone die or get sick, it has a different flavor than simply wishing others well.

Sayadaw: What we’re used to experiencing as compassion is mixed with suffering. That suffering bit is actually aversion because we don’t want things to be that way; we would like things to be fine.

There is the wishing well for others but on the other hand, there is the non-acceptance of the situation or the grief or whatever is going on.

When it is pure compassion, compassion is a wholesome mind, then it will feel good. It can understand that there is suffering, but the mind is not suffering together with it.

Compassion alone has no sense of suffering in it.

DEALING WITH TIREDNESS

Swiss Retreat 2019 Group Interviews 7 (00:10-5:08)

Yogi: I have a problem with feeling tired at the retreat – sometimes there is aversion and other times the wanting to go to sleep. I sometimes accept it as part of being old.

Sayadaw: When we get older, it is natural to be more tired. If we do have aversion towards it, we just need to work with the aversion.

We can let the tiredness be. We won’t be able to meditate the tiredness away. If there’s a body, there will be tiredness. But we can practice so the mind is more accepting and not resisting it.

Now you are tired, that’s a result of something in the past and you can’t change the tiredness now.

But in the present moment, we have a choice of how we want to be with the mind. We can have the right view and right thought and the mind will feel better even if the body is tired.

Or, the mind can complain – it can have wrong view and wrong thought and, so, the body is tired and the mind is stressed.

In the present moment, that is the choice that the mind has. And if the mind is trained, it can be positive.

MEDITATION IS NOT TO FIX ANYTHING; MEDITATION IS TO KNOW EVERYTHING

Swiss Retreat 2019 Group Interviews 4 (00:15-04:45)

Yogi: It is my habit to judge others and myself negatively and comparing myself with others. It is difficult and I don’t like it – I tried to watch but it was not nice.

Sayadaw: All the things that were happening in the mind, they are not important at all. The profit is that you were aware of everything.

Meditation is not to fix anything; meditation is to know everything. That knowing is wholesome because wisdom can grow in it.

SEEING IT AS IT IS WITHOUT INTERFERING

Swiss Retreat 2019 Group Interviews 7 (1:02:40-1:05:24)

Yogi: In the meditation pamphlet, it says to come to the sitting with a relaxed and unbiased mind.

But I realized that my universe is infiltrated with a lot of hidden agendas. It is only now, with some practice, that the window keeps opening and there is more tolerance to whatever is happening – and there is a sense of opportunity.

Yesterday, I went for a walk in the forest and there was a little bird calling from somewhere hidden. Normally, I would throw a stone to make it come out so that I could see it, but I didn’t and there was incredible joy not interfering with whatever was known.

Sayadaw: We have to understand the flavor of non-interfering and its benefit.

Yes, the unwholesome minds always want to interfere, always want to get.

TAKE CARE OF THE AWARENESS; DON’T LOOK FOR SPECIFIC OBJECTS

Swiss Retreat 2019 Group Interviews 8(1:03:10-1:10:04)

Yogi: I notice that I have lots of greed. I wanted to catch it when it showed up in the body, but that couldn’t be because there was already greed to see greed. How can I heal my excessive greed?

Sayadaw: Forget about looking for greed; just be aware.

Just be aware of the present moment as it is, whatever you’re experiencing now – cold, hot or walking. Just something very simple.

Greed arises with conditions; and if we’re aware, we’ll recognize it when greed arises.

We need awareness continuously as much as possible on anything so that awareness is growing; then it’ll be ready.

THE AWARENESS MIND WILL TRANSFORM OUR LIVES

Swiss Retreat 2019 Group Interviews 4 (05.35-06:04)

This knowing mind is what will transform your life – and the knowing just needs to happen a lot. 

WHEN WISDOM LEADS THE MIND

Swiss Retreat 2019 Group Interviews 7 (08:05-10:04)

Yogi: As I was walking, I realized how tricky the mind was, making me perceive things differently from what they were.

It was inspiring to see that the moment I was able to follow Sayadaw’s instructions, the mind changed and I could see clearly.

It was inspiring to see that it was actually working. It gave me more trust and it felt good not in a wanting way; and it was a relief.

Sayadaw: It is true when the practice falls into place, it brings up a lot of faith and it inspires the mind to continue, but don’t discount the previous days.

It is because the mind was trying those days, it fell into place.