Yogi: During a retreat, if I experience something that I have never had before and it is hard to name the experience, what should I do?
Sayadaw: If you don’t know how to name it, it is okay to call it an object or something being known.
Sometimes, it is hard to express because the experience is something new.
Even if we cannot think of a name, we can still understand that it’s an object; then, the mind won’t be agitated and go into thinking.
Yogi: When the pain arises, the object is very clear. Why then do we watch aversion instead of the pain?
Sayadaw: When the pain arises, there is anger. For the normal yogi, when the pain arises, the mind reacts to the pain with aversion.
If the mind watches the pain with anger, then we’re not meditating because the pain will increase; for example, if we’re angry with someone and we pay attention to them, then the mind will get angrier and angrier.
This is the same principle. That is why if we want to know the nature of the pain, we need to watch it with equanimity by taking care of the anger first.
Yogi: When the physical pain is not intense, I can still watch it in a detached way. But what about cancer patients who are in great pain?
Sayadaw: For yogis, the mind can be peaceful when pain arises if there is some understanding or realization.
We don’t think about cancer but know that experience is an object. Understanding of the object is not thinking about the cancer.
Pain is the object when there is an understanding of the object and the knowing mind. When you’re aware of nature, there is nothing to be upset about.
The mind does not react because of wisdom.
The mind is quick to judge because of pleasant and unpleasant sensations. We should watch the pleasant and unpleasant sensations until they become neutral, then only we think.
We can think neutrally only when the mind doesn’t react to the sensations. The neutral state of mind can understand the meaning of ‘as it is’. That is why we watch the feeling until the pleasant or unpleasant feeling becomes neutral. That neutral mind can understand ‘as it is’. There is a relationship between mind and object – the state of mind can see its related kind of object.
We can watch our feelings continually because the mind judges all the time. Like when watching pain, we watch the unpleasant feeling until it becomes neutral; at that time the mind can understand the nature of the pain.
Yogi: When anger arises, I also see the thoughts and the storyline. I’ve been seeing the same thing with the same triggers for more than 2 years, usually about the same person.
Sayadaw: It means that the mind has not learned yet although you can be aware.
There is nature and the storyline – feeling is nature. Feeling has no concept, it is only intensity, strong, weak, strong, weak, that’s it.
The storyline is the problem – who, where, or what. Concept is defilement object while nature is wisdom object. Choose what you want to do.
Now, you understand that if you pay attention to the concept, defilement will arise. If you pay attention to nature, the mind will calm down.
So, which way do you want to go?
Sayadaw: If you think, it means that you do not know, right? Thinking and knowing are different. If we think, it means that we don’t know.
Now, we try to know if awareness is present or not, checking if awareness is there or not. That is why I ask you: What is the mind aware of?
Yogi: Sometimes, I think I’m aware, but I’m not sure.
Sayadaw: If you think, it means that you do not know, right? Thinking and knowing are different. If we think, it means that we don’t know.
Now, we try to know if awareness is present or not, checking if awareness is there or not. That is why I ask you: What is the mind aware of?
The beginner starts by choosing this object and that object. If you choose the object, the idea of self is already there.
When the mind naturally knows an object, the mind has already chosen the object – so, this object does not belong to you and there is no idea of self.
For example, if you choose to be aware of your breath and the mind then knows the pain, which one is yours? Breath is your choice and pain is not your choice. Breath is personal and the idea of self is there. Pain is not personal; naturally, the mind knows it. You didn’t choose it, so, it is more obvious that it is not personal.
Sayadaw: There are the three universal characteristics of nama-rupa (samanna-lakkhana) – anicca, dukkha, anatta – and there are the specific characteristics (sabhava-lakkhana).
For example, fire element has its own characteristic – burning. The first step is to understand that every paramatta or nama-rupa process has its own characteristic. Later, we can understand the 3 universal characteristics of all nama-rupa.
But many yogis forget about the specific nature of processes, they don’t want to understand this. They just want to find out about the universal characteristics.
First, we need to understand the specific characteristics before we can understand anicca, dukkha and anatta.
The 4 elements have their own characteristics and we need to understand them, one by one.
Yogi: Sayadaw, what are the specific characteristics that we need to understand?
Sayadaw: Everything; like now you are watching the mind and the object. Knowing and being known, these are the specific characteristics of awareness and object.
I like daily life practice because we suffer in our daily life and with practice, we experience less suffering.
I don’t want to tell yogis that if they practice, they’ll be happy; I don’t want to say happiness because people like happiness.
If I say happiness, they’ll get attached to happiness; so, I say less suffering. It is different from happiness.
Yogi: Do we go back to the same object or can we move from object to object?
Sayadaw: It doesn’t matter if you use the same object or many objects; the important thing is to have consistent awareness with the right attitude.
You can use one object or many objects – whichever is more suitable depends on your personality. You can adjust for yourself.
Yogi: I notice that when there are pleasant and unpleasant objects, the awareness is sharp, but when the object is neutral, the awareness is not sharp.
Sayadaw: Normally when the object is neutral the mind is not stimulated to watch it; only wisdom can watch neutral objects.
Pleasant and unpleasant objects are more obvious – they can easily stimulate the mind. That is why the mind is not sleepy when watching these objects.
With neutral objects, the mind gradually falls asleep. That is why the mind must have more wisdom – when understanding comes, this is object and this is awareness, the yogi knows very clearly, and the mind wakes up.
If there is no understanding, the mind becomes sleepy.
Yogi: In the real world, there must be good and bad.
Sayadaw: Very quick, the mind already judges everything.
When we watch our feeling reactions and they come down to neutral, this state of mind can be understood as it is.
Whatever happens, the mind already judges; so, we can start by watching our feelings. When the mind settles down, come back to the object – there is a relationship between mind and object. Pain, for example, we watch the feeling first and when the feeling becomes neutral, come back to the pain. The neutral mind then can understand the nature of the pain.
I used to have knee pain – when I went on alms round and was walking, there would be feelings of pain and no pain. I would watch pain and no pain and suddenly I realized that pain and no pain were both objects. I understood the meaning of an object.
Both pain and no pain are known; when this understanding comes, there is no unpleasant feeling when pain comes, and the mind is not happy when there is no pain.
Pain and no pain are only objects; they are the same. Because of this understanding, the mind does not react.
Yogi: Sometimes it is hard to practice; where do I get the strength to continue to practice?
Sayadaw: Strength comes from effort, faith and wisdom. These three qualities make you continue to practice – faith, understanding and effort.
Some yogis have faith-based personality, and they will try to practice very hard, again and again. They practice patiently with the right effort and saddha.
For others, confidence in the practice arises because of understanding. If you know the benefit of the practice, confidence increases, and effort follows.
You need to appreciate how much you have already benefited from the practice.
The right attitude is holding the idea that the suffering feeling is nature, that there is nobody there.
Because of the right attitude, the watching mind can be equanimous towards a suffering object.
We learn by watching it again and again. So, every time anger arises, we need to watch the anger not from the pain only but from every suffering object – be it a person or situation. Whenever the reaction arises, we try to practice how to watch suffering feeling with equanimity again and again.
We need to practice watching suffering feeling with equanimity and without expecting the feeling to go away.
Yogi: My negative emotions have been growing stronger and stronger over the past few weeks, especially anger. Sometimes the anger is so strong I want to scream and pull my hair and I end up crying.
My teachers always say to be open and to accept it but every time I notice this anger I cannot accept – I’ll run away and suppress it.
Sayadaw: First, you need to think that anger is not yours, anger is anger, and everybody can experience anger. Put in this right view before watching anger.
You do not try to accept; you try to think the right way that anger is nature. And try to be aware of the feeling – the burning sensation – and not follow the storyline. Keep coming back to watching the feeling every time the mind follows the storyline.
Don’t try to accept; it is not necessary to accept. You only need to think that anger is nature. We’re not trying to make the anger go away; we’re trying to know and understand the nature of anger.
Can you do this?