THE Excerpts: 1401—1450

Collected from the talks and discussions of Sayadaw U Tejaniya. Compiled by Chiu Sheng Bin.

Yogi: Just now, I was watching my breathing. When I breathe in and I breathe out, in between there’s a gap.

Sayadaw: Who is breathing in and breathing out?

Yogi: My body is breathing in and breathing out.

Sayadaw: Really? I just said breathing happens because of the intention to breathe. But you said, I’m breathing in and breathing out. This is an idea, the idea that I’m breathing in and I’m breathing out.

You can start being aware of the body sensations, but later, come to the awareness.

If you’re aware of the awareness, you can also recognize the body.

That is why when I remind yogis ‘What is the mind aware of?’ and ‘Do you recognize awareness is present?’ it is also attention to the mind. The body sensation is already with the awareness, right? That’s enough.

Yogi: How do we improve if we’re just knowing and being aware?

Sayadaw: If you continue to be aware, this is already progress.

Moment to moment, if you try to maintain the awareness, it is already improving.

If you stop being aware, then awareness will go down.

If you want to improve, try to maintain the awareness consistently.

When we’re aware there must be awareness and some understanding together.

What kind of awareness do you have? Is it awareness alone or awareness with some understanding? Do you recognize that when you’re aware?

When we practice, we check if the awareness is present. If we know that awareness is present, then we check again what else we know.

Basically, we need to know the object and the awareness mind.

Yogi: How do I maintain interest in the practice?

Sayadaw: If you recognize the benefit of awareness, you’ll want to practice.

Do you understand the difference between being aware and not being aware? You’ll be interested if you can see the advantages of the practice.

The benefit is more obvious when people are suffering.

If you can notice the difference in the quality of mind when you’re aware and when you’re not aware, then you’ll be more interested in practicing.

Yogis try to meditate because they’ve already experienced something good from practicing.

Yogi: Sayadaw says when something disturbs the mind, we don’t follow the storyline.

When I see the storyline, I see that it is the thoughts. So, I should learn to see the nature of the thoughts and not follow the storyline?

Sayadaw: It depends on how much you understand paramattha and pannatti or nature and concept.

When you pay more attention to nature, the mind doesn’t think too much about the concept. You can see the thinking mind arising and gone, arising and gone – that’s nature.

When you pay more attention to the concept, there will be more thinking and more emotions.

You need to understand what is concept and what is nature.

Yogi: Storyline is concept? Thoughts are not concept?

Sayadaw: Yes. Thoughts are just arising, arising; just happening, happening. Happening is nature and storyline is the concept.

Whenever thinking arises, try to be aware of this.

Yogi: When I see the storyline, I don’t follow it and the story will drop? I should try to see the nature.

Sayadaw: Yes, pay more attention to the nature.

Sayadaw: Are you satisfied with your life?

Yogi: Okay; I’m quite satisfied. It is still okay. I can meet good teachers and with a stable job, my life is quite okay.

Sayadaw: Still okay is not okay; this okay is not okay. If there is a lot of moha, then it is also okay.

A lot of people think there is no problem with their lives.

In daily life, try to be aware of your feelings because there are reactions all the time in daily life.

You can be more skillful in being aware in daily life because the mind feels pleasant or unpleasant and happy or sad. Every day, we have a lot of emotions, right? Use them to become more skillful in the practice.

It is important to watch all feelings.

How do you maintain peacefulness in your life the whole day long?

I remind yogis to try to practice when they wake up in the morning and bring that peacefulness to their daily lives the whole day. If you’re skillful, you can maintain your peaceful mind all day. You have to try and practice.

Sometimes, I cannot maintain it too; at times, it’s gone by lunchtime. But we have to try every day.

When we wake up in the morning and the mind is calm and peaceful after sitting, be aware of this feeling and try to know every relationship that affects this peaceful mind; what you’re thinking and what you’re talking and how mental actions, verbal actions or physical actions affect your feeling and mental state. You need to learn and then you can know how to maintain your peacefulness and samadhi level.

Yogi: Sayadaw, is your mind affected by your illnesses?

Sayadaw: Not much because whatever happens just happens.

Good or bad, we need to be aware. It is better that we take care of the quality of our mind because good or bad is just the experience.

That is why I say not to judge the experience one way or the other. If we judge that it is good, we get attached to the experience.

For example, we forget to be aware and enjoy the experience when we’re happy because there is no pain; as a result, we complain a lot when we’re sick.

Pain is a concept. The mind will not be happy if we think about the painful experience. But the object is different, right? When we know the object, it is from understanding.

Understanding that pain is an object and thinking about the pain is very different.

Pain is a concept and people don’t like the pain. Actually, nobody likes the pain.

For the meditator, they don’t think about the pain; they are aware of it as an object, something that is being known, that is all.

Yogi: An agitation arose in the day and I tried to stop it, but the mind just wanted to return to the suffering.

I checked my attitude and asked ‘Why is the agitation happening’ and ‘What is the quality of my mind’. I wanted to know the nature of agitation with right attitude; I waited and watched.

I did not control the experience; whatever happened, I just watched and constantly checked if the awareness was still present.

Later, the mind changed and became peaceful and the agitation and disliking feeling reduced.

Sayadaw: That’s right; it is already good. If we practice the right way, the emotion will reduce. That is why I say if we’re aware the right way, the emotion reduces.

When the emotion increases as we’re aware, it means that something is wrong with the awareness.

Yogi: If I keep on contemplating about ageing and death, won’t I be thinking too much?

Sayadaw: Instead of contemplating, it is better to just recognize as a reminder that we’ll grow old and there will be pain – it is a process. You will not forget then.

When you contemplate, check if the mind is calm and peaceful. If the mind is not happy, then there is dosa. If so, it is not contemplating, it is complaining. 

People are afraid of suffering because they’re attached to peacefulness.

Everybody has lobha already; we want everything to be okay. That is why when something not okay happens, the mind immediately reacts with suffering. Reacting, right?

It is because we’re attached to wanting everything to be good and okay.

We don’t know it – only when something unpleasant happens that we realize our attachment.

Anger arises because of lobha, because of craving, and when we cannot get what we want.

We cannot accept it because we expect a good experience.

My teacher never used ‘I or me’; he only used the plural ‘we or us’ when he referred to himself.

If a psychiatrist heard him, he’d think something was wrong with my teacher.

‘I’ is the wrong view, but people are used to the wrong view or moha and think that if you have moha, you’re good. If you don’t have moha, then something is wrong with you. This is a strange idea.

But if you watch the self objectively, it is not yours because it is the object.

Yogi: During the sit, I was very angry with the air conditioning and the mind kept going to it; and every time the mind went there, I asked it to come back to the body.

Sayadaw: So, what have you learned?

Yogi: I cannot control the mind.

Sayadaw: I don’t want you to control the mind; what do you learn from this process?

You need to learn from the process, again and again. After a few times, you’ll realize something about it.

You want to calm down, isn’t it?

Yogi: Yes, I’m doing samatha practice.

The mind arises and passes away all the time, but it leaves its quality; both wholesome minds and wholesome minds.

When we keep practicing, the wholesome minds continue to increase; moment to moment they accumulate.

Why do people get angry so easily? Because they allow anger to happen many times, it is easy for them to get angry. It can get stronger and stronger because that quality has a chance to happen again and again.

You can see for yourself why people have strong cravings or strong anger – it is because they’re practicing these qualities every day.

Likewise, we need to keep practicing the awareness every day.

Many psychotherapists attended my retreat in America. If they don’t know the mind very well, it is sometimes easy for them to be affected emotionally after listening to the negative stories of their patients.

After a long time, they also get depressed by the defilements. It is good that they come to the center to practice to calm down.

Yogi: I have lots of bodily pain due to an illness. What can I do?

Sayadaw: When pain arises, I encourage yogis to watch the feeling, the reaction or anger, not the pain.

Every time you pay attention to the pain, anger will arise because the mind and body are related – we already have the idea that pain is not good.

For the beginner, when they watch the pain, anger arises; and the more they watch the pain, the more intense the anger becomes.

So, I don’t encourage watching the pain but watch the anger instead.

For example, if you’re angry with somebody, what happens when you continue to look at the person? You get angrier because you are watching with anger.

The principle is the same.

Sayadaw: If the Buddha didn’t teach nāma-rūpa, nobody would know nāma-rūpa, there is no way for sure.

Yogi: Even though there were many meditation teachers before the Buddha, but they didn’t understand this.

Sayadaw: Vipassana practice had vanished; they only knew samatha meditation which used a conceptual object. Nobody knew or understood reality; if nobody had heard about it, how could they possibly understand this truth.

Yogis need to learn that when everything is okay, they have to be awake.

If they’re not awake when everything is fine, it is easy to forget. But, if they notice, they’ll see that there is craving and they’re enjoying.

Yogi: When we’re healthy, how do we get ready for the pain of sickness and aging?

Sayadaw: Try not to enjoy and get involved when we’re in a good state. Step back and recognize whatever happens as an experience.

Then, when a bad experience arises, we can similarly recognize and back away from the experience.

This is understanding cause and effect. Anyone who understands cause and effect will prepare for both good and bad experiences.

People are only awake when they suffer; they enjoy and are not awake when everything is okay.

Every time the mind says nice, we need to notice; if we know and recognize, the mind will not follow the experience too much.

Yogi: When I saw a pretty bird, lobha arose; but when I couldn’t see it, dosa arose and I felt uncomfortable. The mind asked some questions about why lobha came in. I realized that lobha arose because I looked at the bird as a concept and not as nature; it was the cause of lobha.

The mind asked why dosa then arose and I understood that lobha was the cause and dosa was the effect.

Realizing this, I was happy; I had never understood it this way although it was very simple. I also noticed that the happiness was also due to lobha.

Sayadaw: Whatever happens, step back and recognize. This is the yogi’s responsibility.

Whatever happens, okay, let it happen and just step back and recognize.

Yogi: Now, I know how to practice and how to ask questions.

Sayadaw: With experience, slowly you'll know how to contemplate the experience as you’re aware of it, how to watch the experience with wisdom.

Then, you’ll be more interested to watch.

Sayadaw: When there is anger, the mind says something and some attitude is there. You need to see both your idea and the feeling.

So, you watch your feeling and thought together.

When the anger comes down, the attitude in the mind changes about the object.

We need to learn about the mental process. Later, you can know that your feeling is related to your thoughts, and not because of the object.

Yogi: I’m really scared of the dentist because doing a tooth implant is so painful.

Sayadaw: You don’t want the pain because you want comfort – there is too much attachment to comfort and you resist the pain. It depends on your attachment.

You think that pain is very bad; that is why the mind resists. There is already a negative idea about pain. The mind cannot bear it because you think that it is very bad.

And also, who is in pain? The pain and ‘I’ together so the mind resists even more.

First, you need to think that the pain is nature. When you think about the pain in the right way, it becomes less and less; it depends on your understanding level or your attachment and wrong view. The wrong idea makes your mind afraid; pain is not difficult.

It is painful because of the idea, not because of the pain. So, if you can think about the pain in the right way, there will be less fear and less pain.

The pain itself is not the problem but the way the mind thinks about it. All reactions come from wrong view.

Nature is cause and effect; there is no self. Because of self, all defilements increase.

What we can do to realize this truth is practice and because of wisdom, the view changes – i.e, wrong view (miccha ditthi) becomes right view (samma ditthi).

Always step back and notice the experience; recognize this is happening and that is happening. If there is no awareness, then it becomes your personal experience; but if the awareness recognizes the experience, it becomes the object.

Yogi: I notice that breathing in and the rising of the abdomen happen at the same time.

Sayadaw: Everybody thinks that cause is first and effect follows. In Buddhism, sometimes cause happens first and effect is later; and sometimes both cause and effect happen simultaneously.

When we switch on the light and light appears, which comes first? Right? This is cause and this is effect, but they happen at the same time.

It is the same with the breath and the movement of the abdomen. There is already some air in the lungs; so, when you breathe in, both the in-breath and the rising of the abdomen happen simultaneously.

If you can be aware of two objects at the same time, then you can be sure of the answer.

Yogi: During sitting meditation, I see a thought and I come back to my body sensation, but the thought comes again and I again come back to my body sensation.

Sayadaw: The story comes again, but the mind is new, not the old one, but the new one.

The concept is old or the same, but the reality is always new.

Thinking mind is new; the story or concept is old.

Yogi: What is the connection between wrong view and the defilements?

Sayadaw: Wrong view is the fertile ground for growing defilements. If you’re thinking about ‘I’, the defilements can increase very strongly. If there is no ‘I’, it is the first stage of enlightenment.

Defilements can grow stronger because of wrong view.

When we understand ‘as it is’, seeing the natural process of cause and effect, then the view becomes right that there is no atta or no self.

The first step is to change the view because the defilements will only go down when the view changes.

But people try to reduce the defilements without changing the view, but there is no way to do that.

Yogi: Understanding non-self is the effect of wisdom, we cannot do the effect?

Sayadaw: We practice every day, checking our mind and seeing the mind and object repeatedly. And at times, we ask: Who am I and where is ‘I’?

Checking nature, and depending on what you understand about this object, that is already investigating wisdom.

Yogi: Last few days, the mind had totally no interest to practice. Today, the interest came back, even during eating. I saw that it was very different when there was interest and when there was no interest, the quality of mind was very different.

Sayadaw: You should know the quality of your mind all the time – when the awareness is good, you know that and when the awareness is no good, you also know that.

Yogi: How to continue to improve? Watch the body and mind?

Sayadaw: Yes, that’s all – as much as you can stay with yourself. That’s the yogi’s responsibility – make it a habit.

Whatever you do – mental, verbal, and physical actions – try to know as much as you can.

If the yogi practices consistently, when we’re aware of the object and we pay attention to the object, every time the mind looks and focuses, awareness is already there.

Awareness is already present when we try to focus on some object like looking and listening or when we pay attention to something we’re doing. It has become a habit.

Now I’m looking at you, if the mind knows I’m looking, already awareness is present because of habit from long time practice.

Every time the mind pays attention, focuses, or is aware, the mind automatically knows this is happening.

Dreaming is thinking; that’s all. Dreaming is nothing.

People think dreams are very important, but it is actually the mind thinking.

Because of dreaming, the image arises; the mind creates the thought and image.

Sayadaw: How do we understand nature? Nature is difficult to express.

Yogi: There is somebody there when we talk about the self; but for nature, there is nobody there.

Sayadaw: Yes, but nature has its own characteristics. Every reality has its own characteristic, e.g. lobha has its own characteristic.

Yogi: They have their own nature.

Sayadaw: Yes, nature is not something solid that we can hold, but can only understand. They have their own cause-and-effect process.

For example, the nature of object – we can only experience and understand the being known nature of the object, but we cannot show it.

Vedanā (mental feeling) is also the mind. So, watching feeling too is cittānupassanā.

But vedanā is between physical and mental processes; it involves both physical and mental experiences.

Because of phassa (contact), vedanā arises. Without phassa, vedanā does not arise. Phassa is nāma and rūpa touching and therefore involves a physical process; that is why we also need to know vedanā.

The 3 yogi jobs are sati, vīriya, and dhammavicaya, or awareness, effort and wisdom.

These are 3 of the 7 bojjhaṅgas or factors of enlightenment – they are the cause factors while samādhi, pīti, passaddhi and upekkhā are the effects.

Yogi: I realize that I push too hard when I practice; I’ve got used to practicing with strong intentions.

Sayadaw: Try to relax when you practice; most foreign yogis have the strong intention to come and push to get something.

When there is too much forcing, the mind gets tense.

Yogi: I realize that it is good motivation, but I have to get rid of the pushing.

Sayadaw: Yes, when you practice you need to relax.

Motivation is necessary, but we need to apply gentle effort and avoid pushing too much.

The mind becomes tense when we push hard; as a result, the practice becomes difficult.

Yogi: It may sound ridiculous, but once I find something I appreciate, automatically my mind has lobha.

Sayadaw: Yes, the defilements are very skillful to occupy your mind.

Yogi: For example, when I enjoy and appreciate the peace and calmness, automatically it is mine.

Sayadaw: That is why when any experience arises, good or bad, step back. Step back means to think as nature, not yours.

Now, that you know that the mind is doing this, you can let go, but if you don’t, you’ll keep indulging and enjoying the feeling.

So, next time you cannot be peaceful when you meditate, you become angry.

Many people, when they are peaceful, want to meditate; when they are not peaceful, they don’t want to meditate.

Because they enjoy this peacefulness, later when they cannot get it, they resist.

So, it is good to know. You are ready to know the mind.

Yogi: Whenever I lose the awareness, I automatically feel guilty.

Sayadaw: Okay; just recognize that the guilty feeling is happening. No problem.

We often say that we must practice continuously, but when you lose awareness, there is no problem either.

Everybody loses the awareness; so, don’t think that it is something serious.

Yogi: I’m a very serious person.

Sayadaw: That makes the practice more difficult.

We try as much as we can; that’s all. The result is not your responsibility, otherwise, there will be regret and you have to watch this mind again and again.

Since this is your habit, you need to recognize it whenever regret arises. Use it as an object and there is no problem.

Yogi: If we understand a reality experience, are the 3 characteristics of anicca, dukkha, and anatta there with the experience.

Sayadaw: These are the 3 general characteristics of reality; yes, they are present in every mind.

Yogi: Is it not either one or the other?

Sayadaw: It depends on your understanding; some people just understand anicca, dukkha, or anatta, but if there is sufficient wisdom, you can understand all 3.

It depends on your level of understanding.

Yogi: A lot of old practitioners, even though they have heard of nāma-rūpa, but they still cannot notice nāma.

Sayadaw: Because they only know the concept which is obvious. The physical object is more obvious because of concept. The mind is totally reality, nature and we cannot make a concept out of the mind. The physical object is more obvious because of location or form.

Yogi: I thought I know the mind after practicing a long time; but after learning from Sayadaw, it is a different thing altogether.

Sayadaw: Because you know the mind with the concept; people know the mind with thoughts. Reality has no shape, no form and no color and cannot be expressed; the mind can just know experientially.

This is why the beginner yogi cannot know the awareness mind; they can only know the object.

When we say non-self, the process is there. When yogis say they understand ‘no me, no I’, I would ask: Okay, there is no me no I, then what is this person? What is this experience?

The process exists; the cause-and-effect process is present and the nāma-rūpa process is there; the only difference is the view, either me or nature.

Only the view is different, the view changes – right view and wrong view. The process is already there.

Yogi: It is hard to notice lobha because every time it says ‘very important’, the story is very convincing.

Sayadaw: Be careful if the mind says ‘very important’. When that happens, there is a surge of energy.

Lobha always says hurry, hurry.

Most of the time, it is because of lobha, but it could also be from fear, worry, and anxiety.

Wisdom understands that it is important, whether it is necessary or beneficial, but most of the time it is greed that thinks it is important.

Yogi: How to tell whether it is wisdom or lobha saying ‘it is important’?

Sayadaw: You can see the quality of your mind – how do you feel whenever the mind says ‘it is important’. Wholesome mind has wholesome qualities and likewise, unwholesome mind has unwholesome qualities like suffering, tension, or heat.

Wisdom sees that something is important, but the mind is not agitated; wisdom thinks how to do it.

Wisdom always checks out the cause; greed just wants to get the result.

Yogi: When I went on alms round with the monks, I felt more aware although many things were happening. Even though I was doing many things, my mind was still balanced.

That’s why I want to go on alms round.

Sayadaw: That’s good, but it is because of practice and not because of the alms round. During the alms round, the mind reminds you to be aware.

The activity is not important, the practice is more important. You like to practice at that time because the mind wants to practice.

Yogi: Previously, when I noticed the ‘don’t know’ mind, I’d try to create the knowing mind, trying to be more aware.

When I heard Sayadaw talk about the ‘don’t know’ mind, I became interested in that.

Sayadaw: Yes, yogis try to get the awareness mind to see a clear object. They don’t want to learn about this ‘don’t know’ mind.

Yogi: That’s an old habit. Previously, when the awareness stares at the ‘don’t know’ mind, the mind becomes restless.

But now after hearing Sayadaw talk about the ‘don’t know’ mind, when the awareness notices the ‘don’t know’ mind, I notice the mind already knows.

Sayadaw: Sometimes, when the mind pays more attention to the object, the mind knows more about the object.

Other times, we understand the mind more when it knows many objects, like when it observes ‘the not-knowing’ mind, it is not clear, but when it moves to other objects, they become clear.

Sayadaw: What state of mind says ‘very’? In normal life, what state of mind uses the word ‘very’?

Yogi: Aversion, like ‘very hot’.

Sayadaw: When the defilement is strong, we use the ‘very’ word, for example, very nice.

A yogi always says ‘nice, very nice’, and I say to be careful because it is a totally wrong view, totally moha.

Yogi: I notice that 3 days ago my mind was stable even though there was worrying and restlessness happening. This is strange to me.

Sayadaw: The experience is unstable, but the watching mind is stable; this can happen.

Some yogis report that the object is suffering, but the watching mind is equanimous.

They can see the experience mind and the meditating mind.

In vipassana practice, we’re very free because we’re not trying to change or control anything; we keep on knowing.

It doesn’t take much energy. The vipassana meditator is very relaxed because they have nothing to do except watch like a member of the audience acknowledging anything that is happening.

On the other hand, the samatha meditator has to use a lot of energy.

We’re not trying to control or change the process. Just try to know – if you know you’re meditating.