DHAMMA DISCUSSIONS

Dhamma discussions or meditation interviews give you an opportunity to share your meditation experiences with your teacher and get some advice. 

The teacher wants to know how you are doing –  whether you are able to be relaxed and aware, whether your awareness is continuous, whether you can recognize your wrong and right attitudes, whether you can recognize and observe your reactions, how you feel, what you have understood, etc. Such information forms the basis for Dhamma discussions; only if the teacher knows your strengths and weaknesses can he give you proper guidance for your practice. 

You can talk about where you are at and where you would like to be. You have to be true to yourself. If you report only on your good or only on your bad experiences, it will be difficult to give you the advice you need.

When you are new to the practice you will have to remind yourself often to be aware. At first you will be rather slow in noticing that you have lost awareness and probably think that it is fairly continuous. But once your awareness becomes sharper, you will begin to notice that you actually lose it quite often. You might even get the impression that your awareness is getting worse when in fact you are just becoming more often aware of losing awareness. This is a step in the right direction. It shows that your awareness is getting better. So never give yourself a hard time, simply accept where you are at and keep reminding yourself to be aware.

Just reminding yourself to be aware or mindful, however, is not enough. In order for mindfulness to become stronger you also need to have the right attitude, to have an observing mind free from defilements. Observing becomes difficult if, for example, you are worried about your progress. First you need to become aware that this is a defilement and then make it your object of observation. Whenever you experience doubt, uneasiness, dissatisfaction, tension, frustration or elation, look at them. Examine them, ask yourself questions such as: “What kinds of thoughts are in my mind?” “What is my attitude?” This will help you to understand how the defilements affect you. You need patience, interest, and a sense of curiosity to do this. As you gradually become more skilful at observing with the right attitude, mindfulness will become stronger and more continuous. This will help you gain more confidence in your practice. 

At this point you will start seeing benefits and the practice of mind­fulness will become less work and more fun. You will find it easier to remind yourself to be mindful and to spot the defilements. As a result, mindfulness will become even more continuous and over time, as the practice matures, mindfulness will gain momentum. 

Once your practice has momentum, you will remain aware naturally. This natural awareness has an almost tangible feel to it and gives you a sense of freedom you have never experienced before. You simply always know when it is there and you experience it most of the time. In other words, you are aware of the awareness, the mind becomes an object of awareness. When you have this kind of momen­tum, the mind becomes more equanimous. 

Now awareness will be strong and you will need very little effort to sustain its momentum. You will always be aware of several different objects without conscious effort. For example, while washing your hands you will probably notice movement, the touch and smell of the soap, the sensation and the sound of the running water. While knowing all this you might become aware of the sensation of your feet touching the floor, hearing the loudspeakers blaring from the monastery across the field, or seeing stains on the wall and feeling an urge to wipe them off. While all this is happening you might also be aware of any liking or disliking. Every time you wash your hands you are of course likely to be aware of different objects. Natural awareness is constantly shifting, constantly sweeping around, letting go of some objects and taking in other objects, shifting from one set of objects to another. 

When you have natural awareness it might feel as though things have slowed down since you can now take in so many different objects, whereas at the beginning of the practice you struggled to be aware of only one or two objects. However, you can still lose your balance quite suddenly when you unexpectedly experience the stronger forms of greed or anger. The difference is that now the mind usually spots gross defilements or wrong attitudes very quickly and they will then either dissolve immediately or at least immediately start losing their strength. You will still lose awareness, the mind can still wander off or awareness can fade, but you usually become aware of this quite soon, i.e. natural awareness snaps back into action.

Before you get too excited though, here is a word of warning. It is not easy to get this kind of momentum. You cannot make it happen. You need to be patient. It is possible to experience momentum after meditating full time for only a few weeks but it will not last very long. Maintaining momentum takes skill and practice. When you first get it you are likely to lose it again within hours or minutes even. Never try to get it back; this can only happen naturally, simply through persistent practice. Most people will take many months or years to acquire the necessary skills and understanding to have natural awareness throughout the day.

When your practice has momentum, concentration naturally becomes better, i.e. the mind is more stable. The mind also becomes sharper, more content, more simple and honest, more flexible, and more sensitive. It can usually spot the subtle defilements quite easily and yet still remain aware of other objects. Natural mindfulness not only enables you to be aware of many different objects, it also enables you to understand cause and effect, to observe details and to deal effectively with more subtle defilements.

You might, for example, feel quite relaxed and calm while walking to the meditation hall and then notice subtle restlessness during sitting meditation. The mind is now aware of the defilement, accepts the experience and starts getting interested. The question “Why is there restlessness?” will probably come up. The mind then simply stays with this question. At the same time you also explore any thoughts, feelings and physical tensions which you know are somehow connected to the restlessness. Then, suddenly you might understand that it is an accumulation of small incidences of stress, frus­tration, or elation that lies behind this restlessness and the physical tension. In other words, wisdom starts sorting things out. As the mind now under­stands the causes for the restlessness, it immediately starts getting weaker and the tension in the body starts softening up too.

If you continue observing you might discover that some restlessness and some tension still remain. The question “Why did those incidences happen?” might come up and bring you a step further. You might see the unnoticed wants, resistances, views, hopes or expectations that led to these incidences. Since you now see the ‘original’ causes for your restlessness, your mind can let go of it completely.

Since the mind has become aware of the causes for this restlessness and tension, it will be on the lookout for similar kinds of incidences that lead to stress, frustration, or elation. When they come up again, wisdom will spot the defilements behind them. This way mindfulness becomes even more continuous, the mind even stronger. Now faith, effort, mindfulness, concentration, and wisdom work very closely together. In other words, the Dhamma is doing its own work.

However, even natural mindfulness cannot always recognize defilements. We all have our blind spots, ingrained habit patterns which we are not aware of. Natural mindfulness will not be able to see blind spots. They are deeply hidden in the mind and therefore inaccessible to direct observation. What mindfulness can see though are emotional reactions in other people. So whenever you notice that people around you become defensive in some way, reflect on your behaviour and your attitude. Usually, however, it will not become clear to you how you could possibly have offended the other person. If you feel comfortable with the person you seem to have upset, you could ask for feedback. Otherwise it is best to describe the situation to a good friend to see whether he or she is aware of your shortcoming in this area. Once you know your problem you could also bring it up in Dhamma discussions. It is important to uncover and explore such hidden habits. Only if you are aware of the wrong attitudes that cause ‘blind’ habits, will wisdom become able to look out for them.

When you are new to the practice you have to make an effort to bring wisdom into play. You have to use your mindfulness intelligently in order to practice effectively. Particularly when you come across difficulties you have to think of ways to deal with the situation. Over time though, as mindfulness becomes more continuous, wisdom starts coming in more quickly to do its work. Wisdom knows the difference between wrong and right attitude, wisdom dissolves the defilements. When your practice gains momentum, mindfulness and wisdom start working together. When mindfulness has become natural, the wisdom you have acquired is always available.

No matter how often you lose mindfulness, always gently and patiently bring yourself to the present moment. Remind yourself persistently to be aware but never be eager for progress. Never mind if others seem to progress much faster than you; you are walking your own path at your own speed. All you need to do is persevere and sooner or later mindfulness will naturally gain momentum.